


We Remain

by sunshinearmin



Series: Drown Me With Rain [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-27
Updated: 2016-11-30
Packaged: 2018-08-17 13:27:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 35
Words: 29,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8145733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshinearmin/pseuds/sunshinearmin
Summary: Modern High School AU





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story was originally published on fanfiction.net in November of 2013. Has been edited and now brought here to find a new audience. Please enjoy and let me know what you think.

Armin POV

"Guys! It's like you're not even trying to study anymore!" Armin whined jokingly as his friends dissolved into fits of giggles and chuckles over Eren Jaeger's impersonation of Mikasa's mooning over the senior, Levi. Armin tried to keep his face serious, but even he couldn't help but laugh as well, as he looked at the face of his best friend of ten years.  


"Who cares about studying when Mikasa's in love with Levi?" Ymir laughed.  


"All of you shut up. I'm not in love with him." Mikasa snapped back, though her beat red face betrayed her.  


"Are you sure you're Mikasa Ackerman?" Jean Kirstein asked. "Because our Mikasa never gets this worked up over something like this."  


Armin had to admit that it was strange to see Mikasa's typically neutral face so emotional about something. Usually, the only time her face left its cool, almost uncaring base was when he and Eren were in some kind of trouble, and she had to go rescue them. These occurrences were surprisingly often given Eren's temper and Armin's strong ideology.  


Mikasa had crossed her arms and sat back in her chair on the Jaegers' patio. "Aren't we supposed to be studying? We DO have a math test tomorrow."  


"Awwwe, stop sounding like Armin as a defensive technique." Ymir teased.  


"Now, now, Ymir. Be nice. Armin didn't do anything." Christa Reiss giggled, snuggling up against Ymir. The whole group knew that Ymir never would have joined their 'study group' if it wasn't for Christa. Ymir wasn't the most social of people, and on top of that, a former member of the most secular group in their school, the Titans. The Titans avoided pretty much everyone outside of their group, although they kept trying to recruit Eren to join them, only to be turned down every time. However, most people considered Christa to be an other-worldly being, and were not surprised that she was the one to pull Ymir into broader society.  


"Yeah. Don't drag poor Armin into this. He doesn't deserve such an awful thing as to be compared to Mikasa." Jean stated bluntly.  


Armin ducked his head, his face flushing slightly. It was well known that Jean had had a crush on Armin. Some part of him probably still did, even though he'd been dating his boyfriend, Marco Bott for almost a year now. Marco was not at today's study session, as he was spending the day with his family. The other missing member of their group was Connie Springer, who hadn't been to a study session in two months, ever since he had started his job at the convenience store. Looking around the circular patio table, Armin realized there was another missing person. "Where did Sasha go?"  


"Wha- She was just here." Christa said, sitting up straight and looking at the empty seat to her left.  


Eren leapt to his feet. "OOOOOOO! Get out of my kitchen, you fiend!" He yelled, running into the house through the open screen door, Mikasa on his heels.  


"Oh. I cannot miss this." Jean said, straightening up.  


"Me either." said Ymir, extending her hand to Christa. All three of them disappeared inside the house.  


Armin remained out on the patio, staring down at the papers everyone had abandoned. Rising to his feet, the 15 year old began to gather them up. He knew Eren, and he would probably end up kicking everyone out of the house for Sasha Blouse's crime of raiding the cabinets. This was quite a common occurrence, after all.  


After gathering up the papers, he quickly collected all the glasses and set them on the tray he had carried them out on, and headed into the kitchen. He peered through the doorway from the kitchen to the living room in time to see Eren chucking pillows at Sasha as she dived around furniture.  


"Eren. You're going to break something." Mikasa scolded, diving to grab Eren's arm.  


Armin shook his head and turned to the sink, setting the tray of glasses down. He never heard her until she began speaking.  


"You look sad again, Armin." He turned and looked at tiny Christa, who was leaning against the kitchen table.  


"Do I?"  


"You do. Not your whole face, but your eyes. Like you feel out of place with your friends."  


"How'd you get to know me so well, Christa?"  


"Peer counseling. Let me see your arm." She said softly.  


"I haven't added to it. But I can show you later, if you're so insistent. I don't want them…" He nodded his head towards the group in the living room, which had dissolved into an all-out free for all between Mikasa, Ymir, Eren, and Jean with Sasha hiding behind whoever and wherever she could. "I don't want them to worry. It's bad enough with just you."  


"Alright. But Armin…" She sighed. "Whether you believe it or not you DO deserve to be happy."  


"Everyone thought I could be happy with you." Armin said quietly, not sure if Christa was aware of the whisperings of the group from before Ymir joined.  


"Did you?" It was clear to Armin that Christa only cared whether or not she had inadvertently hurt him.  


"Not really. But it doesn't matter. You've found your happiness with Ymir."  


Christa sighed slightly. "You need to find your happiness too."  


Armin smirked lightly. "Weren't you the one who told me that I don't need another person to be happy?"  


"Don't deflect."  


Before Armin could respond, the situation in the living room reached the boiling point, presumably because Eren was losing. "That's it!" He roared. "All of you get out of my house!"  


"And there it is." Armin grinned.  


"Took longer than usual." Christa grinned back.  


"That's not how you treat guests!" Ymir yelled from the living room, followed by a smacking sound and a yelp from Eren. Armin assumed that Ymir had smacked him.  


"OW! You're no guest of mine, devil woman! I didn't invite you here!"  


Armin moved to the doorway in time to see Mikasa step between Eren and Ymir, tensions running high.  


"Hey, what's Armin doing alone in the kitchen with Christa?" Eren blurted out.  


Armin had never seen Ymir turn so fast. "What?" She said, her voice menacing in her jealousy. Armin retreated several steps.  


"We're not-" Christa began.  


"They're not alone in here." Sasha said, pushing past them, a bag of potato chips in her hands.  


"How did you get IN there?!" Eren howled. "Get out of my house, you fiend!" He ran at her, though she quickly dodged and bolted for the door. "And give me my chips back!"  


Ymir ran after them to watch, and Mikasa to keep him from hurting himself. While Jean gathered up his things, Christa turned to Armin, placing a hand on his cheek. "We'll talk later."  


Armin nodded as she walked off to get both her own and Ymir's belongings. "Okay." He saw Jean looking at him quizzically. "Tell you later." He said quietly. Jean nodded his head and left. Armin shook his head and sighed, sinking into a chair. Eren and Mikasa were his best friends. So why did it feel so much easier to share these personal things with Jean and Christa?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey so I realized that since I already have this story done, and am literally just copying chapters from my word document, I can update this more often than the fic I'm currently writing XD

Armin POV  


Armin was still sitting in the Jaeger's living room when Eren and Mikasa returned. The blond had grown bored waiting for them, and switched on the television. The news was on, and he found himself watching a story on the growing tensions between his country and the neighboring one.  


"Ha! Tensions never went away!" Armin turned to see Eren enter the room and flop down on the couch. Mikasa entered behind him, silent and cat-like, and lithely sat on the other armchair. "All that happened was a cease fire was called. Millions dead and they couldn't even settle on a treaty to stop the bloodshed."  


"It does seem like all they did was halt the violence long enough to grow our generation up enough to be cannon fodder like our parents before us." Armin hated thinking about the war that had killed his parents, and the bitterness in his voice showed that. Of course, Eren could never fully understand the horror of the war, not like him and Mikasa. Mikasa had lost her own parents when looters and thieves had come calling upon the Ackerman home and afterwards, she'd been taken in by the Jaegers.  


With a disgusted huff, Armin switched off the television. After several moments' silence, he said, "Sooo, did you catch her, Eren?"  


Eren huffed himself and flopped onto his back, his legs hanging over the arm of the couch. "No." He said grumpily. Armin knew Eren well enough to know to look to Mikasa for further explanation.  


"She caught the bus down at the corner, and I had to explain to Eren that you have to PAY for the bus, and he'd left his wallet here.  


"Dirty cheat. Now, I have to explain to my mother why the chips are gone….again."  


"She knows Sasha was here. Personally, I think she buys them just for her." Armin responded. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and briefly wondered if it was Jean or Christa. He didn't bother to check though.  


The trio sat quietly for a few minutes when Mikasa spoke up. "Eren. You should not have thrown Armin under the bus like that just to get Ymir off of your back. That is not how you treat friends."  


"Oh come ON! I was really wondering what they were doing in there! Do you liiiiiike her, Armin? Do you looooove her?"  


"Don't be a cretin." Mikasa retorted, tossing a pillow at Armin's head.  


Armin simply crossed his arms and stared Eren straight in the eyes. "I heard YOU like Levi….or was it Petra?" He tilted his head as if he was pondering the question. "Maybe you want to be in the middle of that love sandwich."  


The teen watched with satisfaction as Eren's face reddened and began to splutter. He couldn't help but laugh and even saw Mikasa smile. "Wha- Where- Why would you think that?" Eren finally got out.  


"Why would YOU think I liked Christa? She's like my sister, you cretin." Out of the corner, he saw Mikasa's smile grow as she tried to cover up a laugh.  


Eren spluttered some more as Armin rose to his feet, stretched, and grabbed his jacket. "Where are you going?"  


"Home. Sunday evenings are for my grandfather, since you steal the rest of my weekends."  


"Oh. Well, see you later then." Eren rolled off the couch and wandered into the kitchen.  


Mikasa rolled her eyes slightly. "He's sorry for what he did earlier, Armin."  


"No he's not. But if he was, he wouldn't be our Eren."  


"Yeah. I know."  


"Well, I'm going to head out now." Armin said, turning and slinging his messenger bag over his shoulder.  


"Yeah, okay. Be safe walking home."  


"Thanks, Mikasa." Armin gave her a small smile as he headed out the door. He was halfway down the block when he saw the young man leaning against the light pole. "Hey, Jean." Armin called, not really surprised by the boy's presence.  


"So, what's going on with you and Christa?"  


Just like Jean. Straight to the point. "She's my peer counselor."  


"Peer counselor…as in…the kids with the-"  


"Emotional problems? Yeah. I had a lot of problems last year….actually, I had a lot of problems all through middle school, but it all came to a head last year when I just snapped and lost it. I, uh, I was planning to kill myself. I was hurting myself. I thought my life was basically over. And then I heard about the peer counseling and I got paired up with Christa and…well, Christa helped save my life. She helped me see that I'm not as useless and insignificant as I tend to think I am. I love her like a sister…well, more of a guardian angel, really." Armin grew quiet to let Jean absorb the information as they walked. He knew it was a lot to take in.  


"Wow….just….wow. Who all knows about this?"  


"Just Christa and my grandfather…and now you."  


"Not even Eren or Mikasa?"  


"No, and I don't want them to know."  


"Why not? They're your best friends."  


"Because I don't. And don't go telling them either. Or anybody. I don't feel it's anybody's business, unless I make it their business."  


"Okay. I promise. Just, damn. I really did not see this coming."  


"Yeah, well it doesn't seem like anyone did. The only reason my grandfather found out was because the school was obligated to inform my legal guardian when I joined the peer counseling program."  


"Wow…" Jean grew quiet as they continued walking down the street. "So, are you…are you okay now?"  


"I don't know if 'okay' is how I'd phrase it, but I'm in a better place now than I was."  


"That's good then."  


"Yeah, I guess." Armin felt kind of uncomfortable talking about this. He didn't want Jean thinking he was a ticking time bomb about to explode at any time. "So, what are your plans for this fine November evening?"  


"Having dinner with Marco and his family."  


"Oh. That's nice." Armin grew quiet for several moments. "Do…do your parents know yet?"  


"No. I just…I don't know how to tell them, you know. I'm worried they'll freak out completely."  


"Yeah. I never would have told my grandfather about me basically going suicidal if it wasn't for the school."  


"I wonder if our parents are as screwed up emotionally as we are."  


"Maybe, but I doubt it." Armin said, coming to a stop in front of his home.  


"How come?"  


"Because they're the ones who survived that long."


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is super short, so I'll post this one today too

Armin's POV  


Armin was walking down the hall with Christa the following morning on their way to math class. They had accepted that they would once again be the only ones in their 'study' group who had actually studied, and when their friends walked in the door, they'd be barraged with questions.  


"So, who do you think will come rushing over first? Eren, Jean, or Connie?" Armin asked with a slight smirk.  


"Hmmmm." Christa pondered. "Probably Connie, since Jean and Eren will be too busy blustering that they're better than the other and don't need help." Christa replied as they walked into the classroom  


"Hello, Mr. Pixis." Armin called, giving their rather eccentric teacher a wave as he walked to his seat. Instead of the standard pairing off of desks, Pixis had aligned them in three long rows of ten. Armin was situated in the middle of the second row with Christa to his left and Eren to his right, with Ymir on Christa's other side and Mikasa to Eren's right. Jean sat directly in front of the blonde, though many times he wished he could switch. Not only because he could see better, but because Eren was perpetually whispering to either Armin or Mikasa. Not that sitting next to Connie, who was positioned to Jean's right, was much better. In history class, Armin had talked Ymir into making Connie switch before he went completely bonkers.  


However, it was too late in the year to be switching anyway, so Armin plunked down in his seat and opened up his binder to pull out the study guide he'd made copies of for the entire group, though it never seemed like anyone but Christa used them.  


True to Christa's prediction, it was Connie who came running to Armin. He heard the boy before he saw him. "WHAT? We have a TEST today? Why did nobody TELL ME? Armin! What is this test on? You have to help me!"  


"One: Mr. Pixis told us all last week that we had a test today. Two: It's on chapter eight. Here's a study guide." Armin handed Connie a copy of the study guide while Christa giggled. Armin couldn't help but smile. Christa's laugh was infectious.  


"What's so funny?" Ymir asked, wandering in with Marco behind her.  


"Connie forgot we have a test today." Christa called as Ymir took her seat beside the petite blonde.  


Armin turned to Marco, whose seat was in front of Christa's. "How was dinner yesterday?"  


"It was good. My parents have basically accepted Jean as part of the family."  


"That's good to hear."  


"Yeah, especially since Jean's worried about being disowned by his own family."  


"That's because his family's stupid and ignorant…kind of like some other people." Ymir raised her voice as two of the well-known Titans in their grade, Reiner Braun and Bertholdt Fubar entered the classroom. Reiner shot Ymir a dirty look as he headed to his seat in the back corner, which Ymir happily returned.  


The tension was broken at that moment by Sasha's arrival. "How long until lunch?"  


Connie's head shot up from the paper at the sound of her voice. "Sasha! Did YOU know we had a test today?"  


Sasha stopped in her tracks. "Oh….THAT'S what I forgot to do last night."  


"Dammit, Sasha! I depend on you for these things!"  


"A terrible decision really." Jean said, sliding into his seat besides Marco.  


"What's a terrible decision?" Eren asked, arriving with Mikasa on his heels.  


"Depending on Sasha." Ymir called out as the rest of their class slowly arrived.  


"Who's dumb enough to do that?"  


"Connie." Ymir, Jean, and Armin all said at once.  


"Idiot." Eren said, flicking a paper football at the back of Connie's head.  


"Ow! Why you-"  


"Alright, class." Mr. Pixis said, rising to his feet. "Papers away and pencils out." The class grew quiet as the test papers were handed out and they set to work.  


40 minutes later, the bell rang, freeing the class to head to 4th period, which for Armin, Eren, Mikasa, Christa, and Sasha was lunch, while Marco, Ymir, and Connie headed to gym, and Jean to his French class.  


Armin's friends all cleared out much faster than him, and he ended up being the last kid in the classroom besides another of the Titans, a blonde named Annie Leonhardt. Armin packed up his things and wasn't even paying attention to the girl as he tucked his binder and textbook under his arm, until she slammed her arm across the doorway in front of his chest, blocking his exit. He froze in his tracks. "Y-yes?"  


"You have 7th period break, right?" She spit out in a harsh whisper.  


"What? Yes. Why?" Armin didn't know what was happening right now.  


"Meet me in the library….and DON'T tell anyone."  


"O-okay." Armin stared after her as she stalked off down the hall. What the heck was going on here? Shaking his head, Armin set off after his friends.


	4. Chapter 4

Armin's POV  


Armin walked really slowly down the hallway, blinking in confusion. Seriously, what had just happened there? He was snapped out of his reverie by Eren.  


"Armin? Are you coming or what?"  


"Yeah, yeah! Wait up!" He shook his head and jogged to catch up. The blonde was quiet for several moments, until he was attacked.  


"Hey Armin!" Sasha yelled as she leapt onto Armin's back.  


"Ahh!" He yelped, stumbling into the wall and dropping his books to the floor in his effort to hold her up. Taking a moment, he settled himself, holding her piggyback style. Mikasa bent down and scooped up Armin's dropped books, shooting Sasha a look. Looking around, Armin noticed that Eren had disappeared. He was about to say something when Sasha spoke.  


"So, what did Annie Leonhardt want?"  


"Um-"  


"What do you mean, Annie Leonhardt?" Mikasa's eyes shot from Sasha, to Armin, and back to Sasha again, before settling on Armin's face. "Did she talk to you?" Her eyebrows narrowed. "Did she threaten you, Armin, because I swear-"  


"No, she didn't threaten me. So far, the only one who's put my health and safety at risk today is the lug on my back. She just….asked me a question is all."  


"About what?" Sasha asked, resting her head on Armin's shoulder.  


"Just about stuff said in class."  


Mikasa harrumphed as she turned her eyes back forward while they made their way down the hallway. "Well, maybe if she and her little friends would shut up back there, maybe they'd actually learn something."  


"Yeah, you shouldn't give them answers, Armin. Let them suffer and fail." Sasha said, in a superior tone very similar to the one Mikasa had just used.  


"Are you mocking me?" Mikasa asked, eyebrows narrowing again.  


"No. I would never, Mikasa." Sasha shook her head rapidly.  


"What are you even doing? He's not a pack mule."  


"Of course he's not. He's my horse."  


"What? No, he's not. Get off of him."  


"I don't want to." Sasha tightened her arms that were wrapped around Armin's neck.  


"Sasha…..Sasha, please loosen your grip."  


"I mean it, Braus. Get off of him."  


"Never!"  


"Choking….not breathing….light going dim."  


"Listen you-"  


Armin knew he had to take drastic measures before either he was accidentally strangled, or the girls got REALLY nasty with each other. So, he decided to fall onto the floor. Sasha let out a shriek right in his ear as they went down.  


"Armin!"  


"Ow, my ear drums."  


"What are you guys doing?" Eren asked, finally re-emerging.  


"And where have YOU been all this time?" Mikasa asked, turning on him.  


"What? I needed to go to my locker."  


"Well, you could have said something to somebody instead of just up and disappearing."  


"Well, I didn't know you were my mother."  


"Guys. Can we please just go to lunch?" Armin cut in as he helped Sasha to her feet. He turned and took his books back from Mikasa.  


"Sure. We can talk about this Annie thing more once we're there."  


"Annie thing? What Annie thing? As in Annie Leonhardt?"  


Armin let out a sigh and cut Eren off before he could say more. "Yeah, sure alright. But we have to get there first."


	5. Chapter 5

Armin's POV  


As the bell for the start of seventh period rang, Armin huddled down in a corner of the library at a table. He had no idea what was going to happen, but he set up his books on the table in front of him as a kind of protective shield. Hearing the door close, he looked up to see Annie walking towards him. Before he could even raise his hand in greeting, she banged her bag down on the table and sank heavily into the chair opposite Armin. He watched her cross her arms and slouch down in her seat.  


They sat quietly for several moments before Armin cleared his throat. "Um, hello."  


"Hi." Annie basically grunted back.  


There were several minutes of continued silence before Armin spoke again. "So, um…why are…why did you ask me here?"  


Annie let out a sigh and didn't answer for several minutes. Armin began to think that she just wasn't going to answer when she finally said, "I….need…help….with my math...and I figured, since you're the smartest kid in our grade by a landslide, and are almost sickeningly nice to people, you might be willing to be my….tutor." Annie looked like she wanted to grind her teeth, and that she hated every word coming out of her mouth.  


"Oh…oh yeah. I can tutor you in math. Yeah, of course. Sure." He sat quietly for a moment. "So, uh, what drove you to ask me….like now?"  


Annie let out another huff of air. "My father has…high expectations for me and the imbeciles…I mean teachers….told me that if I don't pass math, I will not advance to the next grade. Let's be honest, repeating tenth grade will not meet my father's expectations."  


Armin nodded his head as she talked. He understood high expectations. "So, when would you be available to study?"  


"Are you free tomorrow after school?"  


"Um…let me think…uh, no. I have plans tomorrow. What about Wednesday?"  


"Wednesday works for me. No one can know about this."  


"Alright. I understand. Where would you like to meet? My house?"  


"Absolutely not. Your friends might show up, and I JUST said I don't want anyone to know about this."  


"Ooookay, what about your house?"  


"Never. My father can't know about this either. We need to find a place where your friends wouldn't go and my father wouldn't think to look for me."  


Armin sat back and thought for a moment. "How about the public library?"  


It was Annie's turn to sit back and think. "That could work. Nobody would ever think to look for me there."  


"Alright, then it's settled. I'll meet you in the lower level. How about 3:30?"  


"Fine." Annie rose and slung her bag over her shoulder once more.  


"So, that's it then?" Armin asked, looking up at her.  


"That's it. And remember, tell no one or I'll kill you." She turned and began walking away.  


"See you on Wednesday." He called after her.  


"Yeah." She waved a hand at him as she walked out the door.  


Armin pulled a book towards himself and opened it. "Huh." He said quietly. He couldn't believe the great and mighty Annie Leonhardt had come to HIM, tiny and bookish Armin, for help.


	6. Chapter 6

Armin POV  


Armin was sitting in the library Wednesday afternoon, quietly working on his chemistry homework. Glancing up at the clock above the door, he saw it was 3:29. Just then, the door opened to reveal Annie.  


He gave her a smile as she reached the table and said, "Barely made it."  


"Yeah, yeah, yeah." She said, plunking down.  


He closed his chemistry book and pulled his math book off of his pile. "So, let's get started."  


"Sure." Annie pulled her book out of her bag and plopped it on the table with a thunk.  


"I guess we should start with the last concept that you fully understand."  


Annie flipped through her book and stopped on a page, pointing at it. "Here. This is where I lost track."  


Armin leaned across the table and looked at the page she was pointing at. "Okay. Chapter…..Four." He suppressed the urge to sigh. They'd gone over Chapter Four in September. It was October now and the class was on Chapter Nine. Granted, a lot of it was easy math (at least for him), and they WERE in an accelerated, advanced course. Still, he had his work cut out for him.  


"You said you'd help me."  


"I did. I'm still at the table, aren't I?"  


Annie almost looked like she was pouting. "Yes." She said, grumpily crossing her arms and sinking back in her chair.  


"Fine then. Get out your notebook; we're going to get started."  


"Fine." She yanked a notebook out of her bag.  


"Now, do you need me to go over the basic concept-?"  


"I can read."  


"Well, read away then." He studied her face as she was reading her textbook. After several moments, she looked up.  


"What?"  


"You're being nicer than you usually are."  


"What are you talking about? This is my personality."  


Armin shook his head. "No, it's not. Just last week, when my friend Eren bumped into you in the hallway by accident, you threatened to shove a stick so far up his ass he'd puke up a tree if he ever touched you again. I must admit, I do not fully understand the insult. The intent behind it, yes, but the actual insult...no."  


"It's because Eren Jaeger is a pretentious little dreamer who's riding a high horse with his head in the clouds. You, on the other hand, are down to earth, sticking it out in the trenches with the rest of us. Also, Jaeger is an ass and I do not see how you could be friends with him."  


"You're friends with Reiner." Armin shrugged.  


"That's completely different. Reiner is one of my oldest friends."  


"Is it?" Armin asked, arching an eyebrow. "Eren is basically the first real friend I ever made and yes, he may be extremely sheltered from the hardships and horrors of this world sometimes, and that is in part to Mikasa and me, and YES, sometimes he does act like a bit of a prat, but who doesn't on occasion? None of that makes him a bad person."  


"He takes you for granted. He takes almost all of your friends for granted actually, but as one of his oldest, he takes you for granted the most."  


Armin shook his head again. "We all take something for granted until what you had is gone. It could be a job, or a friendship, or a way of life. It's not until you experience a devastating loss that you understand. He's just blissfully naïve. Most of my friends take each other for granted." He shrugged his shoulders.  


"And you've experienced a devastating loss, then? Since you're acting so enlightened?"  


"Multiple, actually. But we're not here to talk about my past. We're here to talk about math."  


"Fine." Annie said, waving her hand. "Let's talk about math." They didn't leave the topic of math for the rest of the time they were there.


	7. Chapter 7

Armin POV  


Armin was surprised at how smoothly the studying session had gone after their conversation had ended. Annie really did seem like she wanted to learn, though she was terribly far behind. He knew they would have to study more than once a week, though he figured he'd broach that subject to her next week.  


So, he went to school on Thursday pretty satisfied with himself. He was standing at his locker, pulling off his coat when Eren and Mikasa found him.  


"Where were you yesterday after school?" Eren asked, leaning against the locker next to Armin's.  


"The library." Armin said, as he stuffed his coat in and organized the books he'd need for the first several periods.  


"We looked for you there."  


"No, YOU looked for him there." Mikasa cut in. "And good morning, Armin."  


Armin grinned. "Good morning, Mikasa. And I was at the PUBLIC library." He said, shutting his locker and turning to face his olive skinned friend.  


"There's a PUBLIC LIBRARY?" Eren asked teasingly.  


"You're hopeless." Mikasa said as Armin laughed. The three of them began to walk down the hall towards their first period classes.  


"Why thank you."  


"That wasn't a compliment."  


"I don't care. I choose to take it as one."  


"So, what did you guys do yesterday then?" Armin asked.  


"Played video games."  


"You mean, attempted to play video games." Mikasa said.  


"Armin, it's not the same without you. Mikasa doesn't do it right."  


"You mean, I don't let you win."  


Armin stopped outside his history classroom. Inside, he could see Connie leaning on Ymir's desk, chattering away. Ymir looked ready to choke him. "I better get in there before Connie ends up dead on the floor."  


"Have fun with that."  


"Oh, it'll be the best. See you guys." He turned and entered the classroom. "Hi Ymir. Connie."  


"Hi, Armin." Connie called.  


"Make it stop before I kill it." Ymir said in a growl.  


"Connie, did you get the homework done." He asked, shooing the boy back towards his own desk.  


"Kind of. I didn't understand the second half."  


"Why didn't you call me?"  


Connie gave him a sheepish look, though it was Ymir who answered. "Because he was doing it at two in the morning and none of us are really sure if this kind, polite thing of yours is a façade and that you're actually a demon at night."  


"It was one in the morning." Connie muttered as their teacher walked in the room. Professor Smith called the class to order and Armin was glad for the quiet. He also rushed from the room as fast as he could after the bell rang, giving Connie no time to stop him to talk more. He really didn't want to be mean, but it was like Connie was forever babbling. So, he hurried off to Chemistry and a peaceful class with Christa.  


They were ten minutes into class and well into the lab they were doing when Christa began her quiet interrogation. "So, I saw you at the library yesterday….with Annie Leonhardt."  


Armin turned to look at her. "Oh, did you?"  


"Yes, I did."  


"I didn't see you."  


"Well, you guys looked like you were working pretty hard, so I thought I'd leave you two alone."  


"Oh, well, that's nice of you."  


They grew quiet for several minutes as they continued working. "So what were you guys working on?"  


"Math. I think you need to add a little more."  


"Oh, that interesting." She said, pouring more liquid into the beaker.  


"Yeah." Armin said, taking the beaker from her.  


"Are you going to invite her to our study sessions?"  


"I'm not sure. She doesn't really want other people to know." He was stirring the mixture.  


"Oh, that's understandable. I think you need to stir it some more."  


"I think I should work with her some more. I just don't think she really likes our friends."  


"Neither did Ymir at first."  


"Still doesn't to varying extents."  


Christa laughed. "She's not that bad."  


"Have you ever seen her alone with Connie?" Armin asked, laughing.  


"True. But anyway, you just have to give Annie some time. Maybe one day she will want to join us."  


Armin nodded his head. "Yeah. I think I'll wait awhile before even bringing the subject up."  


"That sounds like a good plan." She nodded her own head. "So, did you see what Sasha's wearing today?"  


"No. What is she wearing?" The conversation trailed off into the trivial everyday adventures of their friend group.


	8. Chapter 8

Armin POV  


After a few weeks of studying, Armin had to admire how quickly Annie was catching up. They'd covered a couple months’ worth of material in their three weeks of work. He'd seen Christa a few times, and eventually worked up the courage to introduce her to Annie. Surprisingly, Annie was actually nice (and asked if Christa was his sister). Usually, she was rather abrasive when she saw other teens.  


They were sitting in their usual place in the library quietly working on homework when Armin was struck by a thought. He set his pencil down and looked up. "Annie?"  


"Hmm?" She asked without looking up.  


"Are we friends?"  


That made her look up. "What?"  


"Are we friends?" He repeated.  


She looked at him for a moment. "I guess so. I'm not really skilled in the area of friendship, so I couldn't really tell you."  


"Like, are we just studying here kind of friends, or are we at the saying hello to each other in the hallway level of friendship?"  


She blinked several times. "What the hell are you saying, Armin?"  


"If you saw me in the hallway, would you say hi to me? Would you acknowledge my existence in class?"  


"Are you ASKING me to acknowledge you?"  


"I….guess…"  


"Then I can….if you want me to. Are you talking about when it's just us, or when you're around your friends?"  


"Whatever you're comfortable with."  


"Huh…I guess it would be nice to have a friend to acknowledge."  


"Aren't Reiner and Bertolt your friends?"  


"Now THAT is a complicated subject."  


"Oh, sorry." Armin hung his head a bit.  


"Don't be. I said it was a complicated subject, not an off limits one." She sat quietly for a moment before letting out a tiny laugh. "I cannot believe I'm saying this, but I feel like I can tell you things, and you won't judge or laugh."  


He shrugged his shoulders. "We all have our demons." He managed to not look down at his arms hidden beneath a sweatshirt while he said it.  


"Ain't that the truth." She let out a huff of air and closed her book. "The thing is…all three of us grew up in the same neighborhood. Reiner never really wanted to be my friend. Probably because I was girl. But Bertolt did, and he's the reason I ever really joined that group. The whole group really mostly depends on which neighborhood you live in. They don't take kids from the nice side of town. It's also really split up within itself. Kids in different neighborhoods tend to spend more time with the kids from their own neighborhood than others, hence how I've seen your friend Ymir, but never actually talked to her. Anyway, like I said, Bertolt has always liked me. I just never realized how much. And I made it all that much worse last year by dating Reiner for several months."  


"I can see how awkward that would be."  


"It got worse, actually, after I broke up with Reiner. Bert thinks I broke up with Reiner so that I wouldn't hurt Bert. Reiner thinks I broke up our relationship because I didn't want to ruin the friendship between the three of us."  


"So, what's the actual reason you broke up with Reiner then?"  


"Because he's kind of an ass."  


A laugh escaped him in a loud burst and he quickly slapped a hand over his mouth.  


A smile crept onto Annie's lips. "What's so funny?"  


"Just the way you said it. So matter-of-factly. No beating around the bush."  


Her smile grew. "I'm always matter-of-fact. Life's too short for too much bullshit."  


"I'm learning that."  


"You have a nice laugh."  


He laughed again. "I think that's the first time anyone has ever complimented my laugh."  


Annie's face flushed ever so slightly. "Well, it's true."  


Armin's face turned serious. "Why are you so nice to me?"  


Annie shrugged. "Because you're not an ass."  


"So, you're not this nice to Reiner then?" His face stayed serious, though his eyes glinted mischievously.  


"Hell no. I'm supposed to be a tough girl. A badass, you know?"  


"Oh, I see." He nodded his head understandingly.  


Annie stared at him for a moment. "You're teasing me."  


Armin gasped. "I would never."  


"You so are! Prat." She flung her eraser at him before beginning to pack her things up. He laughed as he began to collect his own things. "And give me my eraser back."  


"If you insist." He threw it at her.  


She caught it and stuffed it in her bag. "See you tomorrow?"  


He gathered up his books in his arms. "Yeah. See you tomorrow."


	9. Chapter 9

Armin's POV  


Several weeks passed with Armin tutoring Annie every Wednesday and Thursday. He also spent his Mondays, Tuesdays, and Fridays helping in his grandfather's book shop after school and of course his Sundays were with the study group, leaving Saturdays as his only free day of the week. So, he found himself one cold January Saturday at the park, watching the ice skaters on the decent sized pond.  


He remembered being very small and skating here with his parents, but especially his mother. The blond smiled faintly as he thought of the happy times with his mother that were long gone now. He looked up when he heard footsteps approaching him. He smiled at the blonde that was walking towards him. "Hello, Annie."  


"Hello, Armin." She said, stepping up to stand next to him, her hands shoved in her coat pockets. "I didn't know you liked ice skating."  


"Yeah, I guess."  


"Do you actually skate?"  


"No. Not anymore. Not since I was little, when my parents died."  


She looked at him, her face passive. "The war?"  


Armin nodded his head slowly. "Yeah."  


Annie nodded her head understandingly. "It took my mom too."  


They stood quietly for several moments. Armin knew apologizing didn't help. That it couldn't bring back a lost parent. "My mom used to bring me here all the time." He said, watching the skaters. "I remember, she used to hold onto my hands and skate backwards, pulling me along with her. I used to love it. Spending time with her. Even after the war had taken my dad. She still kept up her happiness."  


"My mom was a dance teacher. She used to take me to her studio all the time, teaching me how to dance. She was at the studio when the bombs fell. I had insisted that I'd wanted to spend the day with my dad. I was at home while my mother was dying from being hit with flying debris."  


Armin looked at her for a minute. "My mom was going to the pharmacy. I was sick, and she was going to get me medicine. Whatever medicine she could get her hands on. My grandfather was sitting with me while she was out." He shook his head. "There wasn't even really anything left to bury….they found half her purse, and one of her shoes….and quite a lot of her blood."  


Annie stared at him mournfully, before turning to look at the skaters. They stayed like that, silent, for several more minutes. "Have…have you ever thought about going skating again?"  


"Have you ever considered dancing again?" He asked as an answer to her question.  


Annie looked like she was thinking hard; her face scrunched up like it did when she was working on a hard math problem. Armin had to admit it was rather adorable. "How about I make you a deal?"  


"What kind of deal?" He asked slightly wary.  


"I'll go dancing again if you go ice skating."  


Armin stared at Annie's face. "How can we prove the other one did it? We could always just say we did it."  


Annie thought for another moment. "We do it together."  


He studied her to see if she was being serious. Seeing no sign of jest, he reached out a hand. "Deal."  


"Deal." She repeated, sticking her hand in his and shaking it.  


"So, want to get out of the cold and go get some pizza? There's a great place down the block."  


"That sounds wonderful. I'm freezing my ass off." She said with a grin.  


"Then let's go." He said, still holding onto her hand from their hand shake and pulling her off down the sidewalk.


	10. Chapter 10

Armin POV  


The following Monday, Armin sat in 8th period Psychology. Their teacher had finished early and the students, all seniors except Armin, were sitting around talking for the last ten minutes of class. Armin was actually in the process of gathering up his things when a voice behind him called out, "Little Brother! I saw you at the pizza place Saturday."  


He turned in his seat to look at Hanji Zoe who sat directly behind him. "Did you? Why didn't you come say hello?"  


"Because I didn't want to interrupt you and that VERY pretty blonde girl you were with. Is she your girlfriend?"  


"What? No. She's just a friend." His face flushed.  


"Awwe, look. He's blushing." Petra said, her voice playful and motherly from her seat next to Hanji.  


"He's so adorable." Hanji said, leaning over her desk to ruffle Armin's hair.  


"Are you SURE Hanji and I can't adopt you?"  


"Legally, no. Also, I'm not sure Levi will be impressed over you two co-raising a child, even if the child in question is 15."  


Petra gasped. "Levi! He could do it for us."  


"He does get away with everything." Hanji replied, and then looked back at Armin. "You have next period with him. Could you ask him for us?"  


"Um...”  


"Pleeeeaassse?" Petra made her infamous puppy dog face, with pouty lip and everything.  


Armin could not resist the face. "I guess."  


"Oh, thank you. You're such a doll."  


"So, who was that girl then?" Hanji asked directly, changing the topic back to what it previously was before they went off on their adoption tangent.  


"A friend in my math class."  


"Just a friend? Because you two looked so adorable together."  


"Just a friend."  


"Oh, leave him be, Hanji. He looks ready to die of sheer embarrassment."  


"Fine. I'll drop it. For now."  


"I think you're jealous that Armin was hanging out with a girl that wasn't you."  


"If that's the case, how about this Saturday, I take you for pizza, Hanji?"  


"Don't toy with me, you cheeky little bugger. My feelings are delicate."  


"Yeah. As delicate as a rhinoceros." Petra giggled.  


"Ugh. I have a very busy schedule, so I'll think about it and let you know."  


"Don't leave me waiting too long. I, too, have delicate feelings."  


"Now, THAT I believe." Petra said as the bell rang dismissing them. Armin wondered why it was so easy to flirt with Hanji. Was it because she was safe? That he knew she wouldn't really toy with him? Hurt him? In any case, he hopped to his feet, grabbed his books, and headed down the hall to Government class. As usual, he was the first one in there, though Levi walked in right behind him. Sitting down at his desk, he turned to look at the dark haired senior who was dating Petra. "Petra and Hanji would like to know if you could adopt me for them since you seem capable of everything."  


He saw the lightest of smirk's on Levi's face. "I suppose I can see what I can do."  


"That's good then. They'll appreciate it, I'm sure." He pulled out his homework from the night before. "Did you get what the author was saying in the third section?" He listened intently as Levi explained it. "Thank you."  


"Yeah." They both sat quietly for several moments. "How come you're taking this class as a sophomore? I mean, you're probably as smart as Hanji and I, but we waited until our senior year."  


"Oh….well, I'm actually seeing if I can graduate a year early."  


Levi let out a light chuckle. "Eager to get out of here? I can't say I blame you. But this school has issues with kids who try and break out of the typical mold. Hanji had ideas of graduating early once."  


Armin let out a sigh. "Well, if I get all of my classes done now, then I'll have to barely show up my senior year."  


That really made Levi laugh, which shocked several of the kids around them. "Now THAT is smart thinking."  


Armin shot Levi a grin as the bell rang and their teacher stood up to begin teaching.


	11. Chapter 11

Armin POV  


Armin was actually slightly surprised to find himself the following Saturday sitting in a pizza parlor with Hanji and Petra. He didn't remember Petra being invited, but he wasn't going to complain that she was there. The more the merrier after all. He guessed the older girls had nothing better to do with their Saturday than hang out in this little place with him. The conversation had started light, but has turned darker and was now on the topic of the looming threat of war.  


"Do you think they're going to issue a draft?" Hanji asked before taking a bite of pizza.  


"They very well may, though I hope they exclude 18 year olds that are still in high school." Petra replied.  


"Levi's 18, isn't he?" Armin asked.  


"Unfortunately."  


"The idiot probably has ideas of enlisting." Hanji cut in.  


Petra's face looked strained. Armin was trying to think of something that could lighten the mood when his phone chimed, signaling that he had a message. He dug it out of his coat pocket and unlocked it. It showed that he had a new message from Annie. He'd given her his number after their second study session but she had never texted him (and it had also taken several more weeks for her to give her number). Intrigued, he opened the message.  


'You know who feels like ice skating? Me. Meet me at the pond at 7 or I will hunt you down and literally kick you in the ass' He couldn't repress the laugh that escaped him.  


"Something funny, Little Brother?" Hanji asked, looking across the table and taking a sip of soda.  


"Just this text message I got." He answered, waving his phone in the air.  


"Anything interesting?" Petra inquired.  


"Just my friend threatening to kick me if I don't go ice skating with her tonight."  


"Oh my."  


"You keep some interesting friends, Little Brother."  


"I am friends with you, Hanji."  


"Oh, you wicked boy." She laughed.  


"Come on Hanji. We should let him get ready for his ice skating adventure. Plus, Levi should be going to work soon and I know it's your favorite thing to annoy him when he's working."  


"That's because he has to be nice to me." They all rose and said their goodbyes before leaving the restaurant. Armin decided to swing by the book store to let his grandfather know where he'd be tonight.  


As he walked, he began to think about how he hadn't really been spending a lot of time with Eren and Mikasa outside of school and their study sessions anymore. Eren had invited him to come play video games tonight, though since Armin had never officially accepted, he figured it would be alright to say he wasn't coming. So, he pulled out his phone and shot Eren a text. 'Something came up. Video games tomorrow night?'  


He was almost at the shop when Eren replied. 'I guess. We won't get as much time’  


'I can see if I can sleep over'  


'I like it. I'll ask mom'  


Armin pushed open the door to the shop. "Grandfather?"  


His phone chimed. 'mom's ok if g-pa is'  


"Yes, Armin?" His grandfather scurried through the door that led from the back of the shop, laden down with books. "Did you have fun getting pizza with Hanji?"  


"Yeah, our friend Petra showed up." He took several of the books from his grandfather.  


"Oh, that sounds like fun. Thank you, Armin."  


Armin began putting the books on the shelves. "Yeah. Um, my friend Annie invited me ice skating tonight."  


"Annie? Have I met Annie?" His grandfather was digging through the drawers under the counter for something.  


"No, I don't think so."  


"Then, which one is Annie?"  


"The one I study with during the week at the library."  


"Oh." He stood up, holding a roll of price stickers in hand. "Wait. I thought you were going to play video games with Eren tonight."  


"Actually, we decided to do it tomorrow." He set the last book on the shelf and turned to look at his grandfather. "I was going to ask you if I can sleep over at his house tomorrow night?"  


"On a school night?"  


"I'll finish all my homework tonight and his mom is okay with it."  


"Well, I guess. Just this once. This better not become a regular occurrence."  


"Thank you, Grandfather." He turned to try and make his escape before his grandfather could ask more questions. Alas, he did not move fast enough.  


"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hang on there, Armin. When are you planning on coming home this evening?"  


"Uh, ten? Eleven? I don't know."  


"Your curfew is eleven."  


"I know. See you later." He started out the door.  


"Hang on. You didn't-"  


"I'll call you, Grandfather." He said, walking outside and letting the door shut behind him. He sighed heavily; glad to have escaped his grandfather's inquisition. The fifteen year old loved his grandfather to death, but his over-protectiveness got annoying after a while. He pulled out his phone. 'Operation is a go. See you tomorrow.'  


'Awesome.'


	12. Chapter 12

Armin POV  


Armin arrived at the pond at 6:59 exactly. He found Annie leaning against the railing. She gave him a wicked grin as soon as she spotted him approaching her. "You're lucky, Arlert."  


"Well, I was forced to push off video games for this."  


"Good to know you value the well-being of your ass over playing dumb games."  


"They're not dumb, and I'm quite good at them. Besides, they're a bonding exercise."  


"Oh? That's how teenage boys bond now?" She raised an eyebrow.  


"Why yes it is. Now are we going to get this show on the road, or are we going to stand around having lively discussion?"  


"If you insist, let's go."  


She led the way around to the skate rental place. Quickly, they rented skates and pulled them on. Armin was alright until he actually reached the ice. The teen had just gotten both feet on when his feet went out from under him. "Jesus, help me!" He blurted out before landing flat on his back.  
Annie let out a laugh that only lasted until she herself stepped out onto the ice. The only thing that saved her from ending up in the same position as Armin was that she had incredibly good reflexes and managed to grab the wall.  


"Not so superior now, are you?" Armin asked as he hauled himself to his feet, leaning heavily on the wall.  


"Shut up."  


Slowly, over the course of twenty minutes, they found their balance and were able to propel themselves without falling….often. "Bloody hell!" Annie let out a growl as she desperately tried to cling to Armin to remain upright. The attempt failed miserably and ended with the pair of blonds leaning against the wall watching the other skaters. "I feel like a freaking toddler."  


"I WAS a toddler the last time I did this."  


"Then the feeling should be familiar." She said with a sly grin.  


"Shut up. Let's go. We're continuing this horrible exercise until our paid for hour is up." He said, hauling himself to his feet and then assisting Annie.  


"Alright, I'll admit it. This was not one of my greatest decisions."  


"I'll say." They somehow ended up with Armin staying within arm's reach of the wall with his right arm, and with Annie's arms wrapped around his left.  


"I think maybe we should give up the dancing thing."  


"Oh, no, no, no, no. You are not weaseling out of that one. We are going dancing." Just then, his phone chimed. Clawing it out of his pocket, he let out a sigh.  


"What is it? Or….who is it?"  


"My grandfather. He's recently learned to text, thanks to Eren…"  


"Well, what did he say?"  


"He asked how I was, and once again, what time will I be home tonight."  


"Well, at least he’s showing he cares."  


"This is the sixth time he's asked me since I left the shop."  


"Oh."  


"I feel like he's smothering me sometimes."  


At that moment, Annie slipped, and by some grace, Armin managed to stay upright. However, she also pushed up Armin's sleeve, revealing the scars on his arm. Seizing his wrist, she looked up at his face. "Armin, what the hell is this?"  


"Well, I…..have had a lot of issues the past few years."  


"Come with me." She grabbed his hand and pulled him off the ice. Turning in their skates and pulling on their street shoes, she led him to a park bench. "I want the whole story."


	13. Chapter 13

Armin POV  


Armin let out a sigh and began. "Well, I told you how my parents died when I was little, my dad when I was three and my mom when I was five. The damn war was almost over." He shook his head, part of him truly shocked that he was about to tell Annie the story. Not even Eren and Mikasa knew the whole story. Actually, the only other person who knew was Christa. But he just felt this weird feeling that it was safe to tell Annie this. That he could trust her with this. So, he took a deep breath and continued. "I was bullied a lot in school, especially after my grandfather moved us to the part of the city that wasn't ravaged by the war. I was that kid with the dead parents who always had his nose in a book. I was ignored for the most part in grade school. But it was in about fifth grade that it all started to go downhill. I had found my voice and was proud enough to spout it everywhere….and the other kids were proud to beat me bloody. It went on consistently for about a year, when Eren and Mikasa found me one day, cornered in an alley. They…they saved me in a way. Of course, the beatings didn't stop…not right away. After a while, after Mikasa proved herself to be brutal and have no mercy that the other kids began to be wary. Of course, it helped that I also finally began to shut up."  


Annie finally spoke up. "What do you mean?"  


"I…..I lost my voice. I stopped spouting my opinion. I stopped speaking up in class. Of course, that is when I whole-heartedly threw myself into my studies. I really became the smartest kid in class then. Not because of my IQ, but because I worked the hardest. But I got worse in my silence. I began to feel worse and worse about myself. That I was worthless, dependent on my friends to protect me. That I was a weight, an anchor that was dragging them down. Those thoughts evolved into that I was stupid, and I'd literally beat myself up over a C, then a B, then even an A. I'd rile my bullies up until they hit me. But then that became too obvious, and Eren and Mikasa were suspicious as to why they randomly started hurting me again, so I began to hurt myself. First, just by hitting myself. Then, it was a rubber band. Finally, a razor. But the thoughts got worse by ninth grade. I began to think that I was so worthless, I'd be better off dead. That no one would miss me. That the whole world would be better off if I was dead. And I was stuck in those thoughts. I couldn't escape them. One day, in like November of that year, I was leaving school and all I could think was that I wondered what it would be like if I got hit by a bus. If I would die instantly, and what would that be like, to have your life snuffed out just like that." He snapped his fingers. "Like my mother's was when that bomb went off. Like mine should have been. I'd never noticed that I had actually stepped out in front of one of the buses. Not until I was yanked backwards out of the way. That's how I met my friend, Sasha. She thought I was just some oblivious kid who wasn't paying attention to where he was walking. I, on the other hand, was completely freaked out. I began to research what could be wrong with me, like the uber-nerd that I am. Depression was the big ticket winner. The next day, I went to the guidance counselor, and she urged me to join the peer counseling program and also to begin seeing some kind of professional therapist. After my grandfather was told, he made sure I did both, and REALLY became a helicopter parent…er, grandparent. Christa was assigned as my peer counselor. Dr. Torra is my psychologist. I used to have to spend a period a day with Christa, and every Saturday, I had to spend an hour with Dr. Torra. Peer counseling ended at the end of the year. I convinced my grandfather and Dr. Torra to cut back on my therapy sessions. They went down to once a month. That lasted until the end of the summer. Then I just stopped going to see Dr. Torra at all. I've also stopped my anti-depressants, not that my grandfather knows that."  


"Why did you stop taking your meds?"  


"I don't like how they make me feel."  


"Armin!"  


"Why should I have to take the meds when I'm not even seeing the doctor?"  


"That's not the point."  


"Why do you care so much?"  


Annie looked taken aback. "Because you're my friend! Does anyone know?"  


"Christa."  


"Christa? Why do you tell Christa everything?"  


"Because I trust her. And she listens without judging me. But before you jump down my throat, she's also opposed to me stopping my meds."  


"Then why doesn't she do something?"  


"Because she's not my mother, and neither are you. But she has told me that if I start to slip and get bad again, she's taking me back to Dr. Torra, willing or not."  


"And I'll shove the pills down your throat if I have to."  


Armin laughed. "Oh, thank you. You're a little aggressive, you know?"  


"I think someone has mentioned that before…once or twice." She grinned.  


They were both quiet for a few minutes. "Annie?"  


"Yes, Armin?"  


He took a deep breath. "Would you want to come to our Sunday study sessions?"  


"What? And spend a long period of time with Jaeger?"  


"Sorry, I asked. It was stupid."  


"No, it wasn't. And don't be sorry….I'll think about it." She sighed.


	14. Chapter 14

Annie POV  


Annie walked home slightly in shock. Armin; smart, kind, funny, unflappable Armin; had been suicidal. Had cut himself. Had almost died before she could ever meet him. Part of her felt like she should have told him about how she had been down that road. That she had scars on her leg because people were less likely to see them than on her arms. But this night had felt like it should be all about Armin, and so she kept quiet. Maybe another time.  


It was completely strange for her to even feel like she could tell someone these things. No one knew her whole story. Not Reiner, not Bertolt, not even her father. Actually, as time went on, her father continued to know less and less about her life. The teen figured that once she moved out, her father wouldn't know anything about her at all. It was actually kind of heartbreaking to know that the man who used to take her to karate lessons, and taught her how to play gin rummy, and snuggle on the couch to watch her favorite shows with her was almost a complete stranger now. What she'd told Armin at their first meeting was a complete lie. Her father didn't have high expectations for her. He barely noticed her existence. She wasn't even failing either; she was actually ahead of most of the class. The reason she had gone to Armin was because she had felt like she'd needed to get away from Reiner and Bertolt for a bit, and Armin had seemed like a safe choice. She was very glad she very had.  


She also loved that Armin felt like he could tell her these kinds of things. Annie was also glad he had asked her to join his big study group. As much as Eren Jaeger grated on her last damn nerve, she was interested in meeting the other people Armin called his friends. While part of her hated that she had lied to the boy, she couldn't say that she hated the results.  


As she walked down the street lamp-lit streets, her phone chimed. Pulling it out, she saw a new message from Reiner. 'Where the hell were you tonight?'  


She groaned. In all the things that had happened and all the things she had learned tonight, she'd forgotten the real reason she had made the skating plans for tonight. Reiner had been planning some slightly criminal activities for the evening and she had wanted no parts of it. She was tired of always worrying about getting caught, or pissing off some gang. So she replied, 'Shit came up. What are you, my mom?'  


'What kind of shit? A hot date more important than me?'  


A blush crept onto her face. Had tonight been a date? It certainly seemed like it could have been. Of course, she also had to wrestle over the idea of whether or not she WANTED to date Armin. But first, she had to deal with stupid-ass Reiner. 'Maybe I did. What's it to you?'  


'You stupid bitch. You can't just bail on me.'  


'Well it looks like I already did. And what? Did Bertolt decide he has better things to do than risk getting arrested and thrown in jail with your stupid ass?'  


'I swear to God Annie when I next see you I will kick your ass.'  


'Bring it on you pansy. You've never been able to beat me and I doubt it will start on Monday.'  


'I fucking hate you.'  


Then why do you talk to me moron?'  


'I don't know.'  


'Well, maybe you should stop then starting tonight. I'm going to bed.' She stuffed her phone in her pocket as she ran up the steps of her porch. Opening the front door, she began to think that maybe she should try to reconnect with her father…but that could wait for another day. She had enough to think about tonight


	15. Chapter 15

Armin POV  


Armin sensed that Eren was restless during their weekly study group meeting the next day. So restless actually, that Armin decided to end the studying early and send everyone home so that he could talk to the boy. He made sure everyone was gone, and Mikasa out of the room before broaching the subject. "Eren, are you alright?"  


Eren looked up at him from where he was sitting on the floor, setting up the video game system. "No. I'm not okay. I never see you anymore."  


"You see him every day." Mikasa said, entering the room while balancing three mugs of hot chocolate in her hands. Armin quickly took one of them.  


"That's not what I mean." Eren said, straightening up and taking the mug Mikasa held out to him. "Where were you yesterday?"  


"Busy. I told you that."  


"Busy with what?" Eren practically yelled. "You're always busy anymore."  


"I have a lot of stuff going on right now.”  


"Like what? You never talk to us anymore!"  


"He DOES have a point there." Mikasa cut in, curling up on the couch.  


Armin let out a huff of air. He was clearly losing this battle…which was a rare event for him. "Fine. I'll admit it. I've been spending time with some of my other friends."  


"What other friends? Like I mean, I know those two older girls, but that was like a one-time deal!"  


Armin finally let his secret out, since it wasn't worth hiding anymore. "I have been spending time with Annie Leonhardt."  


That shut them up. Mikasa's jaw dropped open and Eren's eyes looked like they were about to explode, they were bugging out of his head so hard. Mikasa, as usual, regained her composure first. "You've been what?"  


"Spending time with Annie-"  


"Are you telling me that you blew me off yesterday for Annie flipping Leonhardt?" Eren screamed.  


"No!" Armin yelled back. He didn't want Eren to know about the ice skating thing. "My grandfather wanted me to do something."  


"You're lying!"  


"I am not! How often do I lie to you?"  


"All the time. You lie about those cuts on your arms!"  


Armin's mouth snapped shut. Everyone seemed to freeze for a moment as they all realized what Eren had just said.  


"Eren…" Mikasa said in hushed voice.  


"Armin, I'm sorry." Eren reached towards him.  


Armin drew back, stepping away from Eren as one does when trying to escape someone they don't like. "How long have you known?" His voice was quiet, and eerily calm. He could tell Mikasa was wary, and watched her set down her mug, and her muscles tense, ready to jump into action.  


"Since the summer before ninth grade." Eren said quietly.  


"The summer before-" Armin sucked in a big breath, trying to keep his composure. "And you never said anything?"  


"Neither did you!" Eren was back on the defensive, playing the victim.  


"I almost killed myself! Did you know that?" He heard Mikasa gasp, but all his attention was on Eren. "You claim I'm such a bad friend, but you're no better!"  


“I'm a bad friend? You're the one who felt he couldn't tell his friends that he was struggling, but could tell complete strangers!"  


"Because I didn't want you to worry!" Armin wasn't sure he had ever yelled this loud or this much in his life. "You've always worried about me, and I was tired of feeling like I was nothing but a burden! And you know what; Annie and Christa ARE my friends!"  


"So, you've replaced us then?"  


Armin let out a joyless laugh. "Oh my GOD, you are selfish." He set down his mug and stalked over to his stuff and began shoving things into his bag.  


"Armin, what are you doing?" Mikasa asked, on her feet now.  


"I'm leaving." He said, straightening up and slinging his bag over his shoulder angrily.  


"Armin, please wait."  


"What are you going to do, run off to go see Annie?" Eren spit out.  


Armin never thought about what happened next. He hadn't planned it. His body just seemed to move of its own accord. One minute he was standing there, and the next, his fist had connected with Eren's jaw. Eren stumbled back into the couch and clutched his hand to his face while Mikasa sprung in the space between the boys.  


"Armin-"  


"They were right about you." Armin spit out, his voice filled with malice and venom. "You don't give a shit about anyone but yourself. And I'm done." With that, he turned and stalked out the front door, slamming it behind him. He heard it open again as he stormed down the front steps.  


"Armin, please wait. Please." Mikasa called.  


"I'll call you later." Armin yelled without looking back. He had absolutely no idea where he was storming off to, certainly not home, but he just had to get the hell out of there.


	16. Chapter 16

Annie POV

Annie had to admit she was surprised to find Armin walking down by the overpass in the park, kicking at things. One, because the overpass was where the shady kids hung out, and two: she didn't think she'd ever seen him look moderately annoyed, let alone the livid expression on his face. "Armin?" She asked, approaching him slowly as he kicked at a trash can.  


His head shot up. "Annie." He stopped kicking the trash can and stared at her.  


"Armin, what's wrong?" She quickly moved to his side. Something was definitely wrong as she saw that while his face was livid; his eyes were nothing but pain.  


"He knew, Annie. Practically the whole time, he knew, and he didn't say a word." She had a very good idea of what Armin was talking about, and whom, but it was his next statement that confirmed it. "He knew I was mutilating myself and he never even thought to ask me what was up. What would he have done if I had killed myself? Would he even have cared?"  


"I….I don't know…" She saw the tears in his eyes, and some force unknown to her drove the blonde to close the gap between them and wrap her arms around him. One hand wrapped around his back and the other on the back of his neck, nestled in his long blonde hair as his head rested on her shoulder. It was in that moment that the first sobs escaped him.  


"I thought he was my friend. My best friend, Annie." She felt his arms twine around her waist.  


"I know, Armin. I know." Her brain searched frantically for the right thing to say. She pulled back and put both hands on either side of his face. "Listen to me. You are so much better than how you are feeling right now. You are not worthless and unimportant. You're important to Christa, and your grandfather, and….me. You are important to me."  


He stared at her, tears still running down his face. "I don't know what to do."  


Annie really could not say what drove her to do what she did next. She just had no idea why, but in that moment, she rose up on her toes and pressed her lips to his. She felt his arms pull tight around her waist, pulling her up against him. Her arms wrapped around his neck as her lips parted under pressure from his tongue.  


After several moments, they pulled apart and Annie felt herself flush red. "Well…"  


"Wow…" Armin whispered.  


"Don't you have a way with words?" She said with an unstereotypial giggle. "Let's get you home."  


"No!"  


"Well, you at least have to get out of here. I'm amazed no one jumped you, though I guess people were really wary since you looked REALLY pissed when I found you."  


"Oh…well then…"  


"Come on." She took his hand and pulled him back through the park. The teen plunked him down on a bench. "Give me your cell phone."  


"What? Why?"  


"Because I am figuring out where you are staying tonight, so cough it up." She said, holding out her hand. He fished it out of his pocket and gave it to her without even looking at it. "You have two missed calls from Mikasa and three from Christa…Christa…would she let you sleep over?"  


Armin shrugged. "I don't know. Why don't you ask her?"  


"Why don't I- why don't YOU ask her? You're the one too stubborn to go home."  


"Hey now-"  


"Oh, just shush. I'll call her, you big baby."  


She dialed the number and was shocked as a stream of words assaulted her ear. "Armin? Oh my god, are you okay? Mikasa called me and told me what happened, are you okay? Well, of c-"  


"Christa…this is Annie Leonhardt. I found Armin kicking trash cans in the park and he was wondering if he could stay the night at your house."  


"Oh well, I have to….hang on…" it sounded like the phone had been set down. After several moments, she heard running footsteps returning. "He can. My address is 1230 Maple."  


"See you in a few." Annie hung up the phone. "Let's go. You're having a sleepover with Christa." She pulled Armin to his feet and set off down the street.  


After several moments, Armin finally spoke up as they strode down the street. "So what were YOU doing down by the overpass?"  


She gave him a wicked grin. "What do you think? I'm a hoodrat after all."  


"Oh, shush."  


"No, it's true. Getting into all kinds of criminal activity."  


"Well, sorry I interrupted that."  


"You should be."  


Before long, they were at 1230 maple, knocking on the front door. Annie was surprised that Christa lived so close to her. The door opened and the tiniest blonde of the group (for they were all short and blonde) appeared. "Armin! Oh goodness! Come in!" She ushered him inside and disappeared, leaving Annie standing awkwardly on the front step. After several moments, Christa reappeared. "Do….do you want to come in?"  


"Oh, um, I should be getting home actually."  


"Oh, well goodnight…and thank you….for calling me."  


"Yeah, of course. Goodnight." She turned and walked down the steps and headed towards her house. She certainly had a lot to process.


	17. Chapter 17

Armin POV  


The next morning, Armin found Annie at her locker, his arms full of books and still wearing his coat. "Annie? I think we need to talk."  


"Yes, we do." She spun around and raised her eyebrows when she saw him. "Cold?"  


"What? Oh...no. I just….Eren might go to my locker…"  


She let out a huff, and opened her locker door wider. "Fine. Use mine."  


"Thank you." He quickly stuffed his coat and most of his books in her locker.  


"Why don't you carry a backpack? I've seen you use one on the weekends, but never in school."  


"Oh, well….they were scared that I would bring razors to school...because I used to carry them in my bag."  


"Oh my god! What, do they think you're going to slice up in the middle of freaking math class or something?"  


"Well-"  


"Or do they think that you're going to slice and dice your classmates? Which, looking at these people, would actually be an improvement for the most part." She said, shutting her locker and beginning to walk down the hallway.  


"Annie!"  


"What? I'm only speaking truth right now. Anyway, in my experience, people who mutilate themselves are not likely to hurt other people."  


"Yeah…wait. What do you mean, in your experience?"  


Just then, the one minute warning bell sounded. "I have to go to class."  


"No. Hang on. You're avoiding my questions."  


"Yes, I am." She said, kissing his cheek. "We'll talk about it at lunch." With that, she spun on her heel and entered a classroom.  


"Annie!"  


"Go to class, Armin." She shut the door to her class and left Armin to hurry off to history.  


Three periods later, he found himself sitting at a table in the cafeteria across from Annie. The pair of blonds were quiet for almost ten minutes when Armin finally cleared his throat and spoke up. "Are we dating, Annie?"  


She looked up, and he saw a flash of surprise and possibly fear before she got control of her face, and answered, "I don't know. Do you want to date?"  


"I…..I don't know…"  


Annie's eyes widened. "You don't KNOW? Well, that's not very compelling for me to want to date you."  


"It's not-Look, it's complicated, Annie."  


"Well, explain it to me."  


"I-" he sighed. "Back in middle school, there were girls who used to pretend that they wanted to date me, just for a laugh."  


"Oh my god! What girls? I'll kick their asses!"  


"No. Don't do that.“ He said with another sigh. "It's just…that's why I am hesitant."  


Annie was quiet for a moment. "It never ceases to amaze me how absolutely cruel humans are to each other." She reached across the table and grabbed his hand. "I promise that I will not use this as a joke. Plus, if you think about it, we've already been on a couple of dates."  


He laughed. "I guess you could technically say that." After that, he began to eat his lunch happily. He and Annie sat quietly for most of it, but it wasn't an awkward silence.  


They were just about done eating when Annie looked up. "Incoming."  


Armin turned and saw Mikasa walking towards their table. "Armin? Can we talk?" She asked, coming to stand by him.  


"I'm just gonna go dump our trays." Annie said, rising quickly, gathering their trays, and scurrying off.  


"Sit down, Mikasa." He said, patting the seat next to him. "I'd offer you a drink, but my girlfriend just took mine."  


She sat down carefully on the bench and looked at him. "I'm sorry, Armin."  


"I know you are, Mikasa."  


"I-I should have said something. Should have asked. But Eren….Eren said we should let you tell us. He didn't want to push you into a subject you didn't want to talk about. He was just trying to look out for you. Please don't be mad at him."  


"I'm not angry at Eren…okay, maybe I am a little angry at him." He said with a sigh. "I'm mostly just sad, though. I'm messed up in my head, Mikasa, and I….I need time."  


She nodded her head understandingly. "Just…don't shut us out anymore, Armin." She put her hand over his where it was resting on the table. "We want to help, however we can."  


"I know." He looked over at where Eren was sitting by himself. "You had better get back over there. He looks miserable. I think he's trying to carve up the table."  


"Yeah, and Annie really looks like she would like to sit back down." Mikasa motioned to where Annie was leaning against a pillar, trying to look inconspicuous, but clearly watching him and Mikasa. He smothered a smile, but still gave her a wave. "Are you two officially dating now?" Mikasa asked, drawing his attention back to her.  


"Yeah."  


"Does she make you happy?"  


"She does." He said, nodding his head.  


"Then I'm happy for you." She said, rising to her feet and ruffling Armin's hair. He let out a laugh.  


"Mikasa." He said, grabbing her hand. "I will come around. I just need time. Time to think, and get my head together."  


"I understand. Just don't stay hidden forever." Suddenly, a smile crept onto her face. "And don't keep her hidden forever either. We want to get to know her."  


Armin laughed. "I will try, though it's entirely up to her. I can't make her do anything she doesn't want to do."  


"Oh, I think you have more sway than you think you do. Don't underestimate yourself." She ruffled his hair one last time before walking back over to Eren. Armin could see her whispering to him.  


Annie slid back into her own seat. "You okay?"  


"Yeah," He said, giving her a smile. "I am."


	18. Chapter 18

Armin POV  


A couple of days passed, with Armin and Annie spending as much time together as they could. Armin had introduced Annie to his grandfather, and Sasha and Jean, mostly because Sasha and Jean had insisted. They had shown up during classes, though not together. Sasha had come over during lunch and Jean during gym. Jean was pleasant enough, given he was Jean and wasn't inclined to like most people, but Sasha was even more hyper than usual. Annie seemed to take it in stride, and Armin was grateful that she waited until Sasha had left the table before making a comment about how weird she was.  


Armin still hadn't spoken to Eren in those days. He'd texted Mikasa a few times, and talked to her in math class once. Things just didn't feel quite right anymore, though he and Mikasa were known for sitting in comfortable silence for long periods of time, only interrupted by simple comments. But besides his fight with Eren, his life actually seemed to be going alright. At least, until gym class until Thursday.  


They were playing one of the worst games ever invented in the history of games, dodgeball. Armin was not entirely sure why the game hadn't been banned yet from schools, though he suspected it had to do with people wanting to force the next generation to go through the same torture and humiliation they did, which he did not find fair. Weren't people supposed to want a better life for their children? What made the whole thing worse was the fact that Armin was athletically challenged.  


The kids all had to line up as the teacher separated them into teams. Armin was grateful to have Jean, Annie, and Mikasa on his team. Of course, Reiner, Bertolt, and Eren were on the other team. He wasn't sure if Eren would intentionally hurt him, but Eren did get really competitive and there were always casualties, since the more wound up Eren got, the worst his aim got. He was even known to take out his own teammates. Also, Reiner was looking angrier than his usual expression, and the glares seemed directed at him.  


"Jean...” He said, sideling over to stand next to Jean. "Please don't let Reiner kill me."  


"What-"  


"Oh my god." Mikasa said, stepping up beside them.  


"So, I'm not the only one who thinks Reiner looks ready to take my head off with a rubber ball?"  


"I think he's finally heard that we're dating." Annie said, joining the group.  


"So, it would appear."  


"Hello, Annie." Mikasa said, never taking her eyes off of Reiner.  


"Hello, Mikasa." She replied, equally focused.  


Armin watched Mikasa look across the gym at Eren, and nod her head towards Reiner. Eren nodded briefly before the teacher blew the whistle. He dodged behind Jean as the balls began to fly.  


Annie and Mikasa seemed like the perfect team at this twisted game. He and Jean preferred to hide in the back as long as possible. Armin's time in the first round ended after Eren hit him lightly in the leg. Armin gave him a grateful smile as he jogged off to the side, hearing Jean call after him, "Don't leave me alone with these people. Armin!" Jean joined him soon after on the sideline.  


It was the second round that things got crazy. Reiner took out Jean and then sent a ball flying at Armin's head. He was lucky that he happened to duck. He was not so lucky in the next two balls that came flying at him in quick succession. By some grace, he managed to avoid them both. He didn't avoid the next one that nailed him straight in the chest and sent him flying backwards onto his back.  


"Armin!" Annie ran over and crouched down next to him. They could hear Reiner laughing from across the gym. Annie whirled around to glare at him.  


Armin managed to get to his feet, and walk gingerly off to the side. Luckily, the teacher took pity on him, and let him sit out the rest of the class. Though he was sore, Armin continued through his day normally, until after eighth period. He was leaving psychology when Reiner found him.  


"Hey shrimp! What do you think you're doing with my girl?"  


Afterward, Armin realized he really should have kept his mouth shut, but given that hindsight is 20-20, he said what he said without thinking. "Well, one, she's not your girl, and two, I think I'm making her happier than you ever could."  


These were the types of things that got Armin in trouble with other teenagers, and it didn't fail him this time either. Reiner's face grew very red, and then he let out a growl and swung his fist. Armin's last thought before the fist connected with his face was, 'Oh shit, not again.'


	19. Chapter 19

Annie POV  


Annie heard the shouts and for some reason, felt herself drawn to it. Pushing her way through the crowd, she felt her stomach drop when she heard Reiner's voice. She knew what had happened before she even broke through the crowd. Reiner had gone after Armin. Breaking through to stand in the center of the ring of people, she felt herself flush with rage. Armin was on the ground with his friend Petra kneeling next to him, while his other friend Hanji stood in front of him, glaring at Reiner. "Get out of my way, or I'll knock you on your ass too, you bitch." Reiner growled.  


That was it for Annie. "You leave him alone, or so help me God, Reiner, I will skin you." She said with her own growl. The blonde put her hands on her hips and set one of her best death glares on Reiner. In her peripheral, she saw the crowd retreat several steps.  


"Annie, so kind of you to join us." Annie looked around him to look at Armin's face while Hanji retreated to Armin's side. His jaw had a bruise already forming, and his nose was bloody, though she didn't think it was broken.  


"Why, Reiner? We're over."  


"No. We'll never be over, babe."  


She took a deep breath. "I'm not your babe, for starters." She was trying really hard to keep her composure. They'd been working on her not lashing out and hitting people. She took another deep breath. "Reiner, if there was any chance of us EVER getting back together, you sure as hell have ruined it now with this stunt." She marched past him, slamming her shoulder into Reiner as she went, and knelt down by Armin. "Armin? Are you okay?" She put her hand on his leg.  


"I don't even see why you want to be with that little freak, anyway."  


"Because he makes me happy, you fucking idiot!" She spit out, whirling around and rising to her feet. "And Lord knows YOU never did that for me!"  


"What kind of lies has he been telling you?"  


"Oh my god, your ego has fucking grown."  


"What-"  


"Listen to me, you ignorant fuck! You want to know the reason I broke up with you? The real reason? It had nothing to do with wanting to save Bertolt's feelings or to save our friendship! It was because you're a fucking prick who has absolutely no idea how to treat a woman! You're obnoxious, cruel, self-centered, arrogant, possessive, and just downright fucking awful! People aren't your friends! Bertolt and I were never your friends! We were your lackeys! You think you're some kind of leader, but nobody would WANT to follow you! A leader inspires LOYALTY, not FEAR!" Reiner's face had paled and his mouth dropped open, but Annie was beyond caring. And she wasn't done either. "And THIS!" She motioned back at Armin. "This is the final straw! I'm done. I'm done with you! I'm done with all of it! I want you out of my goddamned life. I am going to be with Armin and his friends and be happy for once in my life, and I swear to God, if you say one more word to me, I will knock your fucking lights out."  


She had turned back around to face Armin when she heard Reiner's voice. "Annie-"  


In a quick motion, she turned and her fist connected with his face, hard. He stumbled backwards and Annie swept his legs out from under him, sending him crashing to the floor. She heard the crowd gasp and back up some more. A distant part of her wondered why the hell a teacher hadn't intervened. Of course, knowing this school, she couldn't say she was THAT surprised. While she had him down, she kicked him in the side. Her voice held venom as she said, "I warned you. And the next time you so much as look at Armin the wrong way, I will personally neuter you." With that, she turned on her heel and marched back to Armin. "We have to get him to the nurse."  


"I'll clear the way." Little Petra said, jumping to her feet and clearing a space on Armin's side for Annie. She quickly filled it, and she and Hanji got Armin on his feet, and started moving him through the crowd.  


"So, I did not think I'd get to meet Armin's Annie quite like this." Hanji said.  


"Yeah, neither did I." She said, giving the girl a slight smile. "How useless are these freaking teachers?"  


"Extremely." Petra chimed from in front of them. The bell rang to signify the start of ninth period.  


"Armin, I think you're missing Government." Hanji said teasingly.  


"Ya think?" Armin said, though it half came out as a groan.  


"Such a shame you'll miss that time with Levi. I know he cherishes it." Petra jokes.  


"Shut up, Petra." He groaned again, resting his unbruised side of his face on Annie's shoulder.  


"We're almost there, Armin." She said softly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are reading this as a completed work, please take a break. Stretch your legs so you don't get blood clots. Drink some water. Eat something. Go to sleep if it's after 1 am. This story will still be here when you wake up.


	20. Chapter 20

Armin POV  


Armin lay on his bed at home, resting on a pillow. His grandfather kept popping in, half concerned and half in a fit of rage. Armin wouldn't tell him who had beat him up and it was driving the man nuts.  


He came bustling in again. "Armin, if you don't stand up to these people, they're only going to do it again."  


"Grandfather, the reason they beat me up is because I stand up to them. My mouth is what gets me in trouble, not saves me."  


His grandfather let out a sigh. "Are you sure you won't tell me who did this?"  


"Have I ever told you who did it? Besides, this time, they won't bother me again."  


"And why ever not?"  


"Because-" Before he could finish, the doorbell rang.  


Armin's grandfather let out another sigh. "This conversation is not over."  


"You still won't be satisfied with the results." Armin called after him as he left the room. Armin could hear him walk down the stairs towards the front door. He let out his own sigh. Why did he always have to do these stupid ass things? Annie had to think he was an idiot. As if his thoughts were magic, the door opened and Annie stepped into the room, an ice pack in her hand.  


"Hi."  


"Hi." Armin said back, sitting up straighter.  


"How are you feeling?" She asked, closing the door and walking over to him.  


"I'm okay. My grandfather's not going to be pleased that the door is shut."  


"Well, he's not the one who's battered." She said, gingerly sitting on the side of the bed. "Your friend Petra told me what happened." She placed the ice pack gently against his cheek. "While I feel it is my duty to tell you how incredibly stupid it was-" Armin let out a sigh. "However," Annie continued, "I also think it was incredibly romantic of you to defend my honor." She said, leaning in slowly and softly kissing his lips.  


"That's me, stupidly romantic." Armin said as Annie pulled away. Annie let out a laugh.  


"You're adorable."  


Armin could hear his grandfather creeping down the hallway, trying to listen. "You know, my grandfather thinks we're in here making out or something, right?"  


Annie laughed again. "Want to meet his expectations?"  


"You're a naughty girl, you know that?"  


"Oh, I'm more than naughty." She winked.  


He laughed, and then his face turned serious. "You were like an angry, vengeful guardian angel today." He saw Annie blush. "It was pretty intense. Though I must say, you're pretty hot when you're pissed."  


Annie blushed deeper. "Oh, shut up."  


Armin laughed. "Are you embarrassed, Annie?"  


"No." She said quickly.  


"You so are." He said, poking her in the side.  


"I said shut up." She lightly hit him on the shoulder.  


"Ow!"  


"Oh my god! I'm sorry! Are you okay?"  


He laughed as he caught her in a hug, rolling so he was over-top of her. "I was kidding."  


"You're the devil, Armin Arlert." She said, as she pulled him down to kiss her.


	21. Chapter 21

Annie POV  


Two weeks after the very one sided fight, Annie was a little fed up with Armin. He was stubbornly still not talking to Jaeger, and was miserable about it. Finally, Friday at lunch she couldn't contain it anymore. "Oh my God! Would you just go make up with your boyfriend already?"  


"What? No! And he's not my boyfriend."  


"Then stop acting like you two just broke up. Go talk to your best friend and stop acting like a stubborn little boy. I can see it's driving you crazy and you're beginning to drive ME crazy."  


"Annie-"  


"If you don't go talk to him, I swear on all that is still good in this world, I will knock you into next week."  


"Okay, okay. I can see the going crazy part." He said, holding up his hands and in surrender as he stood up. The blond slowly walked over to where Jaeger and Mikasa were sitting.  


Annie let out a breath she hadn't realized she had been holding and stared down at the table for a moment. She had had a fear that he wouldn't go. She looked up in time to Mikasa headed right for her table. "No, no, no. Don't come over here. Don't-" She muttered to herself until Mikasa slid into the seat Armin had just vacated.  


"Thanks for talking some sense into him."  


"I didn't talk any sense into him. I threatened him."  


Mikasa raised an eyebrow. "Well, it seems to have worked, whatever you did."  


"Yeah. Seems like it." She glanced over to where she could see the Armin and Eren having a discussion….without either of them yelling or anything. "Well, at least it's not another screaming match."  


"Well, I told Eren I'd punt him into next month if he lost his temper. I don't think he realizes how he really could have lost Armin."  
Annie turned back to look at the other girl. "And you give me dirty looks."  


"I know Eren can take it."  


"Armin is stronger than you give him credit for. A lot stronger." Annie responded.  


They stared at each other across the table for several moments before Mikasa broke the silence, Annie silently noting that she had won that round. "I suppose you two will be sitting with us on Monday."  


"Maybe. If Armin wants to."  


"Try not to kill Eren."  


"Tell him not to grate on my nerves."  


"He grates on everyone's nerves. Learn more patience."  


"What is going on between you two?"  


"What do you mean?"  


Annie leaned back and smirked, crossing her arms across her chest. "You know exactly what I mean. And anyway, our whole grade pretty much wants to know. I could be the gossip queen if I so desired."  


"His family took me in when I had no one else. They're my family now."  


"Doesn't mean you don't feel something other than sisterly affection towards good ole' Jaeger. I mean, you're not even related."  


"You're vulgar."  


"I think you made it up that you like Levi so that your precious Eren wouldn't know your real feelings…though I think his feelings for Petra may be real….unless it's that he wants to be Petra so he can date Levi himself."  


"Just shut up, Leonhardt."  


"Fine, Ackerman. I will. But just know that it's not healthy for you to live such a lie. Though, I must commend you for picking a boy you know would never date you."  


"You're grating on my nerves."  


"Good. Maybe I'll become like Jaeger."  


"You will never be like Eren." Mikasa hissed out.  


"And why would I want to be?" Before she could continue, she saw Armin heading towards them. "Now, Armin is coming back. So have a good weekend, and I'll probably see you Sunday."  


"Who says you're welcome in my house?"  


"Because, one, it's not your house. It's the Jaegers'. And two, that boy-" she motioned towards Eren, "looks like he would do anything to make Armin happy so that he doesn't go away again."  


Mikasa looked like she was grinding her teeth as she got up and walked away. Armin gave her a smile as he passed her before sitting down.  


"Have fun?" Annie asked.  


"Yeah. What were you two talking about?"  


"Oh, nothing much. Just girl stuff."  


"I don't know what kind of girl stuff you and Mikasa could have to talk about, and I feel like I probably don't want to know."  


"So rude." Annie said, playfully hitting his chest. Just then, the bell rang, signaling the end of the period. The pair of blondes began gathering up their things and left the cafeteria with the flow of people.  


Armin playfully nudged her shoulder with his. "Know what I think we should do tomorrow?"  


"Go bungee jumping off a skyscraper?"  


"No….maybe some other weekend." Annie couldn't help but grin that Armin never told her that her ideas where nuts. "I was thinking we should go dancing."  


"Oh no."  


"Oh yes. You have to hold up your end of the bargain."  


"Have I told you that you're the devil, Armin?"  


"I think you've mentioned it, yeah." He said, slinging his arm around her shoulders.


	22. Chapter 22

Annie POV  


Annie lay sprawled across Armin's bed the next day, whining. "Do we HAVE to go?"  


"I would like to remind you that this was technically YOUR idea." Armin said from across the room, where he was rummaging through his dresser trying to decide what was proper to wear to a dance class.  


"Well, I've changed my mind." She said, sitting up.  


"Too bad." He said, rising to his feet and crossing the room. He leaned down and kissed her forehead. "We're going."  


"Why are you so mean to me?"  


"Because I love you." He said, sitting down next to her and gently rubbing his thumb in circles over her leg.  


She was shocked at how casually he said it. Just like that. I love you. She quickly tried to mask her shock. "If you loved me, you wouldn't make me do this."  


He laughed. "You are determined. However, you forced me to go ice skating, so dancing it is."  


"I hope you remember how well ice skating went."  


"I do, and that is why tonight is happening. Also, if you didn't want to do this, you should not have suggested it." He patted her leg. Annie noticed that her pants leg was riding up, but she didn't want to draw attention to it… though on second thought, she was tired of hiding it.  


"Armin?"  


"Yes, Annie?"  


"We-we have an honest relationship, don't we?"  


"Well….I hope we do. I try to be honest with you."  


"Well, I- I lied to you. My father….he doesn't have high expectations for me. He actually barely notices my existence."  


"Why-"  


"I told it to you because I wanted to spend time with you. I-I wanted out of the toxic trap that was my friendship with Reiner and Bertolt, and YOU…oh, you seemed so safe. Like you wouldn't judge me. Like you would be my friend, and not force me to do things that I don’t want to do. And when I mentioned my personal experience with cutting that one day at school, right after your fight with Eren, this is what I meant." She pulled up her pants leg, and showed him the scars.  


Armin gasped. He stared at her face, then down at her leg. She braced herself for what he would say, but to her surprise, he leaned down and kissed her scars. A little gasp escaped her lips and Armin looked up at her face. "I'm sorry, Annie. I should have known."  


She shook her head. "No. I'm good at hiding it."  


He shook his head and leaned in close. "I still should have known. I should have recognized the things that were in me."  


"Don't be an idiot. Everyone's pain is different." She said, leaning in and kissing him, putting her hands on either side of his face. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her back. Annie's arms slid to wrap around the back of his neck. Armin pressed forward and Annie felt herself fall back onto the mattress and pulled him down with her. She wrapped a leg around his leg and felt his hands moving up and down her back until they found the hem of her shirt. Annie felt the heat rise from where his fingertips touched the bare skin of her sides. After several minutes, she pulled back, face flushed and breathing heavily. "I think….we should go dancing now." She panted out.  
Armin blushed deeply as he got to his feet. "Yeah…yeah." He said, helping her rise as well.  


She smiled up at him as she fixed her shirt and leaned against him. "Always the gentleman." She giggled, before letting out a happy sigh. Armin kissed the top of her head before taking her hand and leading her from the room.


	23. Chapter 23

Armin POV  


Armin led Annie up to the dance place where several days before, he had found a sign outside declaring Saturday Night Ballroom Dance Lessons for the public. He gave her a smile as they walked through the door and into a very large room. The floors were wooden and one wall was covered in a massive mirror.  


"Oh, great." Annie muttered. "Perfect for watching us fail miserably."  


"Oh ye of little faith." He whispered back, stifling a laugh as he led her to a table where there were name tags and markers.  


"What, are we in kindergarten?" she whispered.  


"Would you shush?" He said, sticking a name tag to his shirt. Looking around the room, he and Annie were by far the youngest pair there.  


Annie seemed to grasp the age gap as well. "Hey, isn't that your grandfather over there? Who's that with him, his girlfriend?"  


"Oh my god, will you shut up." He whispered as a woman in her fifties walked over.  


"Hello there! Welcome. My name is Edith."  


Armin could feel Annie's eyes on him. He really hoped she was keeping that sarcastic smile of hers off her face. This was not the time. But he could just picture it there. "Hello, Edith. My name is Armin, and this is Annie."  


"It's very nice to meet you both. We'll be starting in a few minutes." She walked off with that to greet some other people.  


"Oh my god." Annie guffawed.  


"Be nice." Armin said, grabbing her hand.  


"I shall struggle."  


"And succeed. You don't have an option."  


"You are a mean boyfriend."  


"Then, we're perfect for each other."  


Her eyes widened as a mischievous grin crossed her face. "What are you implying?"  


"You know exactly what I'm implying." He said as Edith called them all to the center of the floor.  


"Here we go." Annie muttered.  


"Can you be positive about anything?"  


"Very few things."  


Edith demonstrated steps several times with a man Armin suspected was her husband given the matching wedding rings, before she broke them off into their pairs to practice. Annie and Armin were silent for several minutes as they focused on their dancing. Finally, Annie spoke up. "You're actually good at this…like REALLY good."  


"Your shock would be offensive if I didn't know you so well."  


"No, but seriously Armin. I mean, the ice skating-"  


"Well, this doesn't involve moving around with knives attached to our shoes whilst on a freaking sheet of ice."  


"Lovely. Absolutely lovely." He heard Edith sigh as they waltzed by her. He became acutely aware of the other couples continuously glancing at them. He heard a whisper of "young love" several times. He had to suppress a laugh at the idea of what these old people would do if they could hear how he and Annie actually spoke to each other.  


Annie leaned closer and whispered, "These old people keep looking at me, and I don't like it."  


"They're jealous of how beautiful you are…not to mention that when you take off your clothes, everything stays in place."  


"Armin!" She gasped, her face turning red.  


Armin couldn't help but laugh. "I'm only teasing."  


"You're awful. We really are perfect for each other." She laughed, leaning up and kissing him lightly.  


Armin could hear every woman in the room sigh at that moment. He let out his own sigh as he kissed her back. Life finally felt good.


	24. Chapter 24

Armin POV  


Life seemed to settle into a new routine. Monday to Friday was school and in the evenings, Armin worked at the bookstore. Armin's grandfather had given a job to Annie….and Eren for some reason. It was really weird, but Mrs. Jaeger had had enough of his lazing around the house, and had sent him off to the workplace. But while Eren actually being a productive member of society was weird enough for Armin, what was weirder that Annie and Eren actually seemed to get along.  


What concerned Armin was the relationship between Annie and Mikasa. He could see the two of them shoot daggers at each other with their eyes at lunch and at the Sunday study sessions. The blond felt like the two girls were rattlesnakes and would strike at any moment. Armin did not want to find out, or even guess, at who would be the winner of such a fight. He was certainly glad his grandfather had not hired Mikasa.  


He'd actually had to convince Mikasa to find a job of her own so that she would stop hanging around the bookstore, distracting Eren. Literally, every time Eren worked, particularly with Annie, Mikasa was there, usually glaring over the top of a book. So, Armin had helped get her a job as a waitress down the road. He was not sure how long this would last, given Mikasa's people skills.  


On nights he wasn't at work, he was usually hanging out with Jean or Christa, or sometimes Hanji and Petra. On rare events, Petra would talk them all into doing a double date night at a restaurant that comprised of she and Levi, and Armin and Annie…..they were…weird, with Petra doing most of the talking while Armin tried to keep the conversation from getting awkward. Annie usually spent these dinners staring at her plate, while Levi sullenly stared off into space. None of them except Petra actually seemed to enjoy these dinners, though they continued to do it. It was actually Annie who suggested that they start going to see movies, where they wouldn't have to talk. That idea went over much better.  


Saturday nights were for Annie and Armin. Sometimes they went out to the dance place, sometimes to dinner. Sometimes, they even just hung out at Armin's and spent time with his grandfather. Sundays were still for the studying group, which Connie had finally rejoined. Sunday nights were for video games with Eren.  


It was on one of these Sunday's in late April that everything changed. It started out ordinarily enough. He was sitting in the Jaeger's living room with Mikasa, while Eren had run upstairs to get the videogame system that his mother refused to let him keep hooked up to the television. Mikasa was curled up on one of the couches, sipping on a cup of tea watching television.  


"Mikasa?"  


"Yes, Armin?"  


"Why don't you like Annie?"  


She looked up at him from her show. "What?"  


"I'm not stupid, Mikasa. I know you don't like her. I just want to know why."  


Mikasa studied his face and seemed to choose her words carefully. "Well, for starters, I don't think she likes me very much."  


"That's not a reason for you not liking her."  


Mikasa sighed. "I don't know. I just…feel like she's not very nice."  


"Neither are you for the most part."  


"Look, I don't want to talk bad about your girlfriend."  


Armin opened his mouth to say something, but just then Eren walked in.  


"You mean you don't want to talk bad about his girlfriend in front of him." Eren said, kneeling in front of the TV.  


"Eren!" Mikasa exclaimed.  


"What? Honestly, it seems like half of what you talk about anymore is all the things that Annie does that piss you off."  


"Er-"  


"Mikasa, I already knew you were doing it. Eren told me, and even if he didn't, I know you." Armin said, trying to stifle a laugh from the look on Mikasa's face.  


Just then, the television switched to the news. "Whoa." Mikasa said, setting her mug down and leaning forward. Eren turned to look. The news anchor was saying that there had been a bombing in a neighboring city.  


"Oh, no, no, no." Armin said. This couldn't be happening. Not now. Not again. They had apparently been missiles. The ceasefire was over. The war would begin again.  


"Oh god." Mikasa whispered.  


For one of the rare times in his life, Eren was quiet. All three of them sat on the same couch, Mikasa in the middle. They sat there for a couple of hours just watching the death toll climbing and troops scrambling until Mrs. Jaeger came rushing in. "I heard on the radio…" She said, wrapping her son in her arms. Then, she hugged Mikasa, and then Armin. Armin decided it was time to get home and said his goodbyes. He knew his grandfather would be freaking out. Mikasa grabbed his hand and squeezed it, a look passing between them. They meant no offense to Eren, but they didn't think he fully understood the magnitude of what was about to happen. People would start dying by the thousands again. People they knew. People they loved.  


He was barely in the door at home before his grandfather had him in a hug. Armin didn't say anything, just hugged him back. After several moments, he pulled back and said, "What's going to happen to us?"  


"We're going to survive, just as we did before. As we always do, no matter what."  


Armin nodded his head. "I have to call Annie." He raced up to his room and dialed the number, after closing his door. "Annie?"  


"Armin." She answered. He could hear her breathing, and it sounded ragged, as if she'd been crying.  


"Are you okay?" There was a pause and Armin was about to say it was a stupid question when she answered.  


"No, I'm not okay. The world is freaking ending."


	25. Chapter 25

Annie POV  


Annie had not taken the news of the war well. In fact, she'd effectively trashed her bedroom. She'd ripped the curtains down, threw her lamp and clock into the wall, and slid her arm across her desk which sent everything flying. She'd been so upset she'd flipped her mattress off of the bed, screaming for most of the destruction.  


She felt like she couldn't breathe, as if there was someone sitting on her chest, crushing her. No, now it felt like she was drowning. Like someone was holding her under. Her breaths came in huge gasps until she let out a keening wail. The teen curled into a ball on the floor, rocking back and forth with her hands over her ears, just screaming. Her father found her as she began to sob.  


He burst into the room, took one look around, and then crouched down beside her. "Oh, Annie. Oh, my dear Annie." He pulled her into his arms and hugged her tightly, and amazingly, she let him.  


"Who is God going to take from me next? Armin? Reiner? You?" She sobbed, looking up at her father's face.  


He stared at her for a minute and Annie realized in all the months she'd been with Armin, she'd never told her father his name. Her father brushed some hair back from her face. "Annie, I am never going to leave you. Not until I am very old. I promise you."  


"I can't lose anyone else." Annie hadn't let herself feel or show this much emotion in a long time. Usually she mentally locked it away, but she felt like all her walls were collapsing.  


"I know, baby. And I'm sorry for not being there for you before."  


"You're here now." She whispered. It did feel like that's what mattered at this point.  


"Come on. Let's get out of this mess." He led her from her bedroom and downstairs to the kitchen. "Nothing a cup of tea won't help."  


"Tea won't make the war end."  


"You never know, if we made everyone sit down to a cup of tea..."  


"Yeah, okay." She grumbled sarcastically, turning to see what was on the TV in the living room behind her. The death toll kept rising. "The world is ending." She whispered to herself.  


"You know, tea always made your mother feel better."  


"Oh, because I am so much like my mother." She said, turning back to look at him.  


"You are." Annie gave him a quizzical look. "No, really. I guess you don't remember your mother as well as you think you do. You're stubborn, fierce, strong, loyal, caring. Also, you look like her."  


Annie felt her breath catch in her throat. She'd never heard her father speak of her like that or her mother. He rarely ever spoke of her at all.  


She had just been handed a cup of tea when her cell phone rang. She pulled it from her sweatshirt pocket, amazed she hadn't thrown that too. Annie answered it, not even bothering to look at who it was. On the other end, she heard Armin. "Annie?" he sounded like he'd been running and was out of breath.  


"Armin." She answered, her own voice ragged from screaming and crying.  


"Are you okay?"  


She pulled the phone away from her ear and stared at it incredulously. After all that had happened; the war, her room, sitting here having tea with her basically estranged father…She stuck the phone back to her ear. "No, I'm not. The world is freaking ending."


	26. Chapter 26

Armin POV  


It was chaos in school Monday morning. Apparently, the recruiter was there, trying to snap up seniors two months before their graduation. Armin had stopped at his locker to organize his books in his brand new backpack that he'd received for his birthday. The teen had just turned, his bag on his shoulder, when suddenly he had a sobbing Petra in his arms. "Oomph! Petra? What's wrong?"  


"I hate that idiot!" She sobbed out, burying her face in his chest.  


That explained nothing to Armin. He looked up and saw Hanji approaching. "What-"  


"The complete and utter moron that Petra is dating has decided he's going to blow off his last months of school, get his diploma in the mail, and join the army."  


Armin gasped as Petra sobbed harder. "You have to talk some sense into him!"  


"How can I do anything that would be effective if you guys have already failed?"  


"What?" Petra looked up at him, tears streaming down her face.  


"He's saying, how can he make Levi see sense if we can't." Hanji said in a low voice. Armin could see something was up with her.  


"Hanji, what are you plotting?"  


"I can't let him go by himself." She said.  


"Hanji, no!" Petra whirled around. "You can't! I can't lose you too!"  


Hanji gave Petra a wry smile. "You're lack of faith in us wounds me, Petra."  


"Don't you do it, Hanji!"  


"It's too late. I already signed up."  


"NO!" Petra shrieked before taking off down the hallway.  


"Petra! Don't do something stupid like the rest of us!" Hanji yelled, taking off after her.  


Armin felt like his brain had just been hit with a bomb, shrapnel flying everywhere and scattering his thoughts. His body subconsciously began to move towards Annie's locker. Some part of him registered that Annie's face looked concerned as he came to stand next to her.  


"Armin? What's wrong?" She grabbed his arms. "Look at me. Tell me what's wrong."  


In an almost robotic voice, he recited, "Levi and Hanji have signed up for the army, and I suspect Petra is about to as well."  


"I'm so sorry." Annie gasped, pulling him into a tight hug.  


"We're all going to die, aren't we?"  


"Now, you listen to me, Armin Arlert." She said, putting a hand on each of Armin's cheeks. Her hands felt cool to the touch. "Don't talk like that. Don't you EVER talk like that. We are going to be fine. We are ALL going to be fine. And you know what? Your Hanji seems crazy enough to keep all three of them alive, so don't you worry about them. And don't worry about us. We're smart enough to stay alive."  


Armin looked at her skeptically. "I don't think your IQ is a factor when bombs are falling from the sky, hitting things at random."  


"Okay, then. We're all lucky enough to stay alive."  


"I don't think you can really-"  


Annie rose up on her toes and kissed him on the lips. "Would you stop trying to disprove me? We all survived the first half of this war."  


Armin just shook his head, choosing not to continue the argument, and to instead kiss his girlfriend again. Still though, he had a very bad feeling in his gut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously though, you are like ten chapters from the end, take a break if you ignored me earlier


	27. Chapter 27

Annie POV  


The first air raid drill was held on that Wednesday. Annie still remembered the procedure from when she was little. If in public, move to the nearest shelter. If at home, get into your basement, or a basement nearby. If at school, move into the hallways. The first air raid happened the following Monday.  


They had been huddled in a shelter near their favorite pizza place when over the radio they were given the all clear, and told the worst hit areas of the city. Foster Square was hit the hardest. Foster Square was where Armin's grandfather had his shop. She found herself running after Armin through the streets at a full on sprint. All their running meant nothing though. A bomb had hit the bookstore directly. Pieces of paper and fragments of books floated through the air. Armin had collapsed in the street, wailing. Annie ventured closer, into the rubble. She found a shoe, and what were probably his eye glasses and then on a chunk of concrete, what looked to be blood. Annie decided she didn't want to look anymore.  


She went back to Armin, trying to suppress her rising nausea and block out the sight of that blood. The teen crouched down next to her boyfriend, gathering him in her arms. 

He sobbed onto her shoulder, and she knew no words could ease this pain. The pain of grief and loss, especially when so sudden. To have something so dear to the heart snatched away in the blink of an eye…  


Annie called the first people she could think of to help them: Eren and Mikasa. She knew Armin couldn't go home, that it wouldn't be good for him in that house. So, she told the dark haired pair where they were, and waited for rescue. When they got there, she asked Eren to take Armin to their home while she went to his house for things. Eren understood and they led Armin away.  


The Arlerts' front door was unlocked when she got there, which Annie found strangely comforting. It was like Armin's grandfather was still looking out for them. Once inside, she ran right up the stairs to Armin's room. She seized a bag and started shoving things into it at random. A handful of socks, couple pairs of underwear, some tee shirts, and a few pairs of pants. Armin's two favorite books were also dropped into the bag, along with the photo of little him with his parents that stood on his nightstand. Running back downstairs, she had the front door open when she stopped, and turned back to the living room. There on the mantel was the photo of Armin with his grandfather, holding the trophy he had won for the science fair in middle school. Next to it was a photo taken a couple weeks before, in the bookstore. It was of all of them, Armin, his grandfather, Eren, Mikasa, and herself. They hadn't been paying attention to Mr. Arlert as he set the camera up, until he ran over and told all of them to smile. She felt the tears sting at her eyes as she seized the two pictures, and bolted out the front door.  


She ran for about two blocks before slowing down to an even, steady pace to begin the trek to the Jaegers'. Usually, they would catch the bus, but it did not seem like they were running. Most likely, they'd been stopped because of the bombing. She didn't mind the exercise, but she really hoped they got the buses up and running again soon. She did not want to have to do this walking crap every freaking day if she wanted to go somewhere. She'd learned how to use the bus system at 8 years old so she wouldn't have to walk all over creation.  


After what seemed like eternity (but was actually 45 minutes), she reached the Jaegers'. She couldn't say she was surprised this area of town had been untouched by the bombing. It had been untouched in the last war too. It was like the place just seemed to repel bombs. Knocking on the door, she was greeted by Mrs. Jaeger.  


"Oh, Annie." She said, in her soft, wispy voice, ushering her in. "Come in. Come in. We're in the basement."  


Annie nodded her head and quietly followed the brunette down the steps into a nicely finished and furnished basement. Was everything the Jaegers owned super nice? She'd thought for sure they'd have a dark, grungy basement, but alas, it wasn't.  


All of the thoughts were wiped from her mind as soon as her eyes settled on Armin. He wasn't crying anymore. Instead, he was staring blankly at the wall, like a zombie. 

"Armin?" She asked softly, setting the bag down, with the two extra pictures on top, and going over to sit next to him on the couch. He didn't say a word to her, just laid his head on her shoulder. She stroked his hair gently.  


After an hour, they ended up with Armin's head in her lap sound asleep and her gently running her fingers through his hair. Somehow, the Jaegers had become the meeting ground for everyone. Sasha was sitting on the floor in the corner, unusually quiet. Apparently, her father was out of town and she had nowhere else to go. Connie had stopped by, then took off towards home. Christa had come in, Ymir trailing behind her. Annie could see that Christa hurt for Armin when she was told what had happened. Armin was already asleep when Christa got there, and she had softly kissed his forehead and gave his shoulder a squeeze before going and sitting with Ymir, the pair of girls just holding hands and resting their heads against each other.  


Annie thought the pair of them were a good match, and their drastic differences made them more compatible. She suspected that the two of them were more alike than they let on. She wondered if people saw her and Armin that way. About twenty minutes after the two arrived, Mrs. Jaeger came downstairs. "Eren, Mikasa, I need you to come up here now."  


Annie could see movement at the top of the stairs and heard some kind of keening wail. She knew something was wrong. Majorly wrong. Eren and Mikasa took off upstairs, Christa on their heels. Sasha remained in the corner, Ymir in her chair, Annie on the couch. The three girls all looked at each other. They all just knew someone was dead, and it was probably somebody close to them.  


"Who do you think it is?" Sasha whispered.  


"Do we really want to know?" Ymir responded.  


"I'm sure we'll find out soon enough." Annie stated.  


Sure enough, after several minutes of wailing, it finally died out. Armin had stirred, though Annie quickly hushed him, returning to stroking his hair. It seemed to work as he went back to sleep. Another couple of minutes passed before the girls heard footsteps on the stairs. Mikasa appeared in the entrance way. "That was Jean." She said softly. "They found Marco….and it wasn't good. We still don't know everything. He's hard to understand with the wailing and all that. Christa is out back talking to him and Eren is helping his mother make tea."  


"Marco's….gone?" Sasha raised her head and stared at Mikasa incredulously.  


"That's what we got out of Jean. We also thought we heard something about Marco's parents, though we don't know." Mikasa sat down heavily. "This has just been a truly awful day."  


"Keep him away from Armin." Annie said in a hard voice.  


"What? How can you even-"  


"She doesn't want him to set them both off right now." Ymir cut in.  


"Oh…well, I guess you're right there."  


"Of course she's right. Just because you don't like her, doesn't mean you have to automatically reject her ideas. Especially not when she's trying to look out for the boy you consider like a brother. Bringing Jean down here, or even telling Armin what happened right now, will only make it so much worse."  


Annie stared at Ymir in wonder. She didn't really know why the tall brunette was defending her. Mikasa didn't seem to know what to do either. Annie didn't think she was used to people teaming up against her. Suddenly, Sasha spoke up. "Mikasa, why don't you come with me to go get some tea? I would love some tea right now." She finally rose to her feet after about an hour of sitting on the floor, curled up in a ball.  


"Yeah…yeah, let's do that." Mikasa rose to her feet and the two of them disappeared up the stairs and out of sight."  


Annie looked at Ymir. "Thank you…for standing up for me."  


"Yeah, well I know how it feels to have people dismiss you just because they don't like you."  


"Well, Mikasa really doesn't like me."  


"Really? I never would have guessed that. Besides, I can see you're hurting too. You're putting on a brave face, but I can see it there, underneath the surface."  


Half an hour later, Christa stopped halfway down the stairs, looking exhausted. "Ymir, I would like to go home now." She called tiredly.  


"Coming." Ymir called back, jumping to her feet. She turned to Annie, pulling a marker from her pocket. "I'll give you my number."  


"Yeah, here." She held out her arm and Ymir scribbled her number on it.  


"Text me." Ymir said, before turning and darting up the stairs. Annie resumed absentmindedly stroking Armin's hair while he slept. She was sure Christa would tell Ymir all the details of what had happened, and that Ymir in turn would tell her.


	28. Chapter 28

Annie POV  


The following day, after a sleepover at the Jaegers', Annie watched Eren and Mikasa get sent off to school. Sasha had also ended up sleeping over, and just kind of hovering on the periphery until her dad called, saying he was home. Then she took off, though not before giving Armin a tight hug.  


Armin seemed like he had checked out. His body went through the motions, but the spark that made him Armin simply wasn't there. He ended up asleep on the living room couch by one o'clock. Annie hoped her Armin eventually came back to her. She missed him already. The teen got a phone call from her dad. Annie realized that she had forgotten to call him the day before. She quickly let him know what had happened, and said that she didn't know when she would be home, but that she was okay. Her dad just said that it was good of her to take care of Armin, and to take as long as she needed. Then, he said he had to go to work and hung up the phone.  


The rest of the day was spent quietly, with Armin sleeping, and Annie and Mrs. Jaeger checking in on him. Annie mostly sat in the kitchen, sipping tea and staring at the picture she'd taken from Armin's house. How could Armin's grandfather be gone? He'd been so alive just two days before. Eren and Mikasa came in the house and were immediately hushed by Eren's mom. They were given a choice to either go upstairs, out back, or downstairs, but to leave Armin alone. Eren chose the basement, and Mikasa her bedroom. Annie continued sitting at the kitchen table, glad to have been left alone as well.  


A while later, there was a knock at the door that Annie answered, to find Ymir on the other side. Annie couldn't help but be surprised to find her without Christa. The blonde wasn't sure if she'd ever seen the taller girl without her girlfriend somewhere nearby. "So, I got the whole story from Christa."  


"Come on." Annie led the girl to the backyard. "Okay, so what happened?" She asked, sitting down in the grass and soaking in the May sunshine.  
Ymir sat down beside her. "So, apparently, Marco was outside, skipping school to spend the day getting their house ready for his grandparents to come stay with them. Their house had been hit hard by that first bombing, since they live down in the factory district."  


"Not a place I'd want to live right now. I'll take my slum any day."  


"You got that right. But anyway, Marco was outside with his dad, and his mom inside, when the sirens went off. They didn't even have time to get inside before bombs were falling. One hit the street right by them. Marco and his father were blown apart. From what Christa got out of Jean, half of Marco's face was just gone. He was the one who found the family."  


"Oh my god." Annie sucked in a deep breath. That was not something she ever wanted to see. She couldn't imagine being the person to have found that, particularly not of someone you loved. She didn't think she could ever stomach seeing Armin like that. The mere thought of it made her nauseous.  


"Yeah. Details I didn't ever need. His mom was standing by the front window when the whole front wall of the house blew in at her. She's in the hospital and the doctor's don't know if she'll wake up, but if she does, she'll definitely be blind in her left eye, from glass."  


"Honestly, I don't know if she'd even want to wake up. Her whole family is gone." Annie just shook her head. The whole thing was awful. She knew Christa would want to know the whole Armin story, but Annie didn't want Armin having to go through that, so, she figured it was best to just tell Ymir now. "We went straight to Armin's grandfather's book shop. The bomb fell right on the building; the whole store was basically a crater. Armin was already on the ground crying. I went over closer to the whole, found one of Grandfather's shoes. Pretty sure part of his foot was still inside it. I didn't want to look anymore after that. I just dropped the shoe and turned back to Armin."  


Ymir nodded her head understandingly. "Yeah, I wouldn't want to find anything like that either." The two girls sat quietly for a while before Ymir finally asked, "How's he holding up?"  


"It's like he's a zombie. Like, he's here but he's not REALLY here, you know? When he's not eating or staring into space, he's sleeping. He won't talk, will barely move. It's scary."  


Ymir opened her mouth to say something, but at that moment, a howl of anguish erupted from inside the house. Annie took off like a shot and reached the living room at the same time as Mikasa. She wasn't even fully aware that Ymir, Eren, and Mrs. Jaeger had also come running. All of her attention was on Armin.  


He was sitting up on the couch, eyes wide with terror and looking around in a panic, his breathing ragged and sharp. His eyes locked on Annie's. "ANNIE!" She was at his side in a heartbeat, gathering him in her arms. "I had a dream that you were caught in an explosion. You and Mikasa. You guys died!" He tensed up again. "Where's Mikasa?"  


Annie seized hold of Mikasa's arm and dragged her into Armin's sight. "She's right here. It was just a dream, Armin." Mikasa sat down beside Annie and took Armin's hand in her own. In the background, Annie saw Mrs. Jaeger shooing the other two from the room, while Annie kept trying to soothe Armin. "It was just a dream. Nobody's hurt. There were no explosions. It was all just a dream." She felt his breathing slow.  


After a few moments, Armin pulled back and looked from Annie to Mikasa. "Marco's dead, isn't he?"  


Mikasa and Annie exchanged a look. "How do you know that?" Mikasa asked, sliding up closer and squeezing his hand tighter.  


"I wasn't fully asleep yesterday…"  


Annie let out a sigh. "Him and his father are dead, and his mother is in critical condition, though it's not looking good for her either."'  


Armin nodded his head slowly. "How are any of us supposed to survive this war if we're already dropping like flies two weeks in?"  


"At this point, I honestly don't know." Annie said, shaking her head.


	29. Chapter 29

Armin POV  


A week later, Armin got a phone call from Hanji. "Armin?" She said, her voice tight and sounding like she was crying.  


"Hanji? What's wrong?"  


"It's Petra. She's….she's dead. We don't…Levi found her. Her squad was ambushed. All of them are dead."  


"Oh….oh my God." Armin groped for the side of the couch before sitting down. He could see that Annie, who was across the room, had become acutely aware of his movements.  


"How can she be dead, Armin? Petra! Little, sweet Petra! Shot full of holes like a sack of potatoes. This can't be happening! How can this be happening?"  


Images flashed through Armin's mind. Petra working on a hard math problem; giggling over the thought of Armin having a girlfriend; her eating pizza; the look on her face whenever she saw Levi; her sobbing when she discovered that Levi and Hanji had enlisted. Every minute, she had been so alive, so full of untapped potential and life and love and light. "I don't know." He said softly.  


He could hear yelling in the background somewhere around Hanji. "I've got to go. I'll call you." With that, the line went dead.  


Armin stared at the phone as Annie crossed the room and came and sat by him on the couch. "What is it?"  


"It's Petra…she's dead. She was shot and now she's dead."  


"Oh God."  


He nodded his head in disbelief. He couldn't believe that Petra, who was so full of life, was gone. That her life was extinguished, her body still and cold. She would never get up and walk around again. Never eat pizza again. Never laugh. Never cry. Never speak. The spark that had made her Petra was gone.  


He rested his head against her shoulder. "I think…I think I want to go to school tomorrow."  


Annie looked at him. She had started going to school again last Thursday, though she was still staying at the Jaegers'. "Are you sure?"  


"Yeah, I just…I need to get back to something that feels normal."  


"Okay. We'll go to school tomorrow." Annie wrapped her arm around him and rubbed his shoulder.  


"Okay." Armin pulled out of her arm and stood up. "Let's go have some iced tea. I saw Mrs. Jaeger make some earlier. He couldn't quite figure out why he wasn't freaking out. Was he already used to people he cared about dying? Or was he just better at internalizing? He honestly didn't know the answer, though at the moment, his brain just felt numb. Part of him hoped that it stayed that way because he didn't want to feel the way he felt whenever he thought about his grandfather. Oh god, Grandfather… He shook his head quickly, erasing the thoughts from his head.  


"Armin?" Annie followed him into the kitchen. "I-I don't want to leave you if you still need me, but I-I have to go home. My father-he's been sitting at home all alone and-and he's been having more and more bad days, like he did right after my mom died and-I'm scared, Armin. I'm scared he's going to do something to himself." She looked down at the floor.  


"Oh my God, Annie. Why didn't you say anything?" He pulled her into a hug and felt her bury her face in his chest. "Don't even worry about me. I'll be fine. Just go take care of your dad."  


"Thank you." She said, pulling back.  


Armin gently brushed a lock of hair back behind her ear and cupped her face with his hand. "You don't have to thank me. He's your dad, Annie. I would give anything to have my dad here and alive."  


Annie nodded her head. "Eren's upstairs, then, and Mrs. Jaeger and Mikasa should be home soon. I'm gonna-I already packed my stuff."  


"You never UN-packed your stuff." Armin said, giving her a half-hearted smile.  


"Yeah." She stepped forward and hugged him. "I'll call you, as soon as I figure everything out."  


"Take your time."  


"Yeah. She turned and grabbed a bag Armin hadn't seen her carry up from the basement where they'd been sleeping. He wondered how long she had been planning on going home, and why she hadn't told him.  


"Annie?" Armin called when she reached the front door.  


She turned back to look at him. "Yeah?"  


"I love you." She simply nodded her head at him before walking out the door.


	30. Chapter 30

Annie POV  


Annie sat at home on the couch, staring into her mug of tea. She could tell that her father was more than pleased to have her back home, but it just felt strange to not have Armin there. Not after they'd been around each other all the time. Not after having shared a bed, meals, the same air. She mentioned it to her father.  


"Oh Annie. The pair of you have your whole lives to spend together. I think at seventeen you can spare some time for your old man."  


"I know, but it's just…..I don't know. I guess I'd just like it more if Armin was here. I mean, we're in the middle of a war. We don't know how long the rest of our lives could be."  


"You have grown up in a time of relative peace, Annie. Soon enough, you will know that you can't change your whole life because of the war and what MAY happen. Besides, Armin is in a very delicate place right now and needs to be around people he sees as parents, not some guy he's never met."  


"I know, but….it wouldn't kill you to meet him, Dad."  


"It might. You don't know." He grinned at her. "You're really serious about this boy. A lot more than you were about Reiner. Have you ever….you know...”  


Annie watched her father's face grow red, and felt her own begin to match. "Not with Armin." She said, shifting uncomfortably. She had never wanted to have this conversation with her father, and certainly did not want to have it now. The sex talk was not one that she needed. She really hoped he would not ask for details about her times with Reiner….or that one time with Bertolt…  


"But you have-"  


"Yes, I have, and I do not want to have this conversation with you, ever." Her father opened this mouth, but she cut him off before he could say anything. "And yes, I used protection, and yes I've seen doctors, and no, you really don't have to worry about me. I can take care of myself."  


Her father let out a sigh. "You are so much like your mother."  


"No-"  


"You're so like her, you can't even see it."  


She sighed, staring back down at her mug. "When will my friends stop dying?" She asked as a way to divert his attention from the two topics she did not want to discuss, sex and her mother.  


"When all of you are dead. The curse of mankind is that we are all doomed to die. It's a terrible thing for ones to die so young, but all things happen for a reason. Love happens for a reason, and so does hatred. Life happens for a reason, and so does death."  


"No. There's no sense in life and no sense in death. We are all just trying to find our way in the chaos." She rose to her feet and set the mug down.  


"I didn't mean to upset you, Annie."  


"You didn't upset me, Dad. I've been upset for a long time, and I will probably continue to be upset for a long time more. You have your way of coping with all this horror and loss, and I have mine." She turned and went upstairs to her room, shutting the door. She stared at the things that were new that her father had bought her after her fit. It was strange how they could be so easily replaced, but still didn't feel quite the same.  


She began to think about things that she couldn't replace. Her sanctuary, Armin's grandfather's bookshop. It was just gone. Sure, a new building would be put up there in time, and she could always find another job, but the memories that she had, the feeling that she had gotten there….they were as gone as Armin's grandfather. She sank down onto the bed and finally let herself cry for the man. Finally, she let the tight rope inside her unravel, and let herself grieve.  


She hardly noticed when her dad came in, wrapping his arms around her. "Oh, baby girl. You've been so strong for everyone. You don't have to be strong now. Let it out."  


"He loved me…" She whispered. "He loved me like I was his own granddaughter." She sobbed.  


"Of course he did. Who wouldn't love you?"  


"Why can't I say it, Dad? Why can't I tell him that I love him? I know he loves me."  


"Do you love him?"  


Annie stared up at her father's face. "I…I might…I don't…Why can't I say it?" She sobbed, tears streaming down her face as she begged her father for an answer.  


He took her face in his hands. "Because, in this way, you are very much like me, my darling Annie. You're terrified to admit you love something…or someone, because if you do, you also admit that it will hurt very much when you lose it, as we eventually lose everything in this life, including our life."  


"Nooo." She sobbed, burying her face in his chest, feeling his arms circling around her. Hearing him say that people lose everything made her think of losing Armin, and that made her feel like she couldn't breathe. She couldn't lose him. Not him. Not now.


	31. Chapter 31

Armin POV  


School was very strange the next day. He wasn't sure why this was the day he chose to come back, given that they were having his grandfather's memorial service that very evening, though he knew if he spent all day sitting around the house waiting, he'd go crazy. He needed a distraction, so here he was, back at….high school. He was standing by his locker when Christa found him. "Oh Armin." She said, pulling him into her arms.  


"Geez, Christa. Do you have some kind of radar or something? Ding Ding, Armin's back in school."  


"Actually, Annie told me you were coming back today." She said, pulling away and crossing her arms. "So, how are you holding up?"  


"I can't keep sitting around that house all day, and besides, he'd want me to keep going to school."  


"Yeah, I can see that. So, they're burying him tonight?"  


"Not in the traditional sense. They didn't really find a lot of him to bury. But what was found had been cremated, and he's going to be buried next to my grandmother…and my mother on the other side…"  


"Oh…that's so sweet." She looked down a moment, then back up. "So, I also heard about your friend, Petra…I'm so sorry, Armin, I know she was a good friend of yours."  


"Yeah…I can't make sense of why it was her, but then again, there is no sense in war, so I guess that would explain it."  


"Isn't that the truth. But we just have to believe that we'll be okay."  


"But how can we believe that?"  


"Because we are nothing without our beliefs, Armin. They're what make us human." She rose up on her toes and kissed his cheek.  


He gave her a smile and closed his locker door, pulling his bag up onto his shoulder. "That and opposable thumbs." He said, as they began to walk down the hallway.  


"What?"  


"You said our beliefs are what make us human. Those and opposable thumbs."  


Christa laughed as they turned into the science wing. "I wonder what they're talking about." She said, motioning towards Reiner. Annie was in front of him, and the pair where having some sort of conversation.  


"Who knows. Probably something important. Or she misses her friend. They were friends for a long time before she met me. I know I would feel really sad if I had to give up Eren and Mikasa for Annie."  


"But it was her choice."  


"Of course it was, but it can't ease her feelings."  


"Are you worried?"  


"No. She's an independent woman who's going to be friends with whoever she wants…but she's also incredibly loyal." Annie looked up at that moment and they made eye contact. He gave her a little wave before turning back to Christa. "She has this like strange friendship with Ymir now. They text all the time."  


"Oh believe me, I know."  


"I'm just glad she has a friend that's a girl. Lord knows she and Mikasa will never get along."  


"I don't know." Christa muttered.  


Armin stared at her a minute. "You aren't jealous, are you?"  


"What? Don't be ridiculous."  


"Oh my God, you are."  


"No, I'm not!"  


"You totally are. Your face is the color of a cherry! Christa's jealous of Annie. Christa's-"  


"Shut up, Armin! I'm going to class." She began to stalk off down the hallway.  


"It's good to see you're actually a real person, Christa!" he called after her, laughing. He turned and walked into his history classroom. His teacher walked over and took his hand.  


"I'm so sorry for your loss, Mr. Arlert."  


"Oh…thank you."  


"If you need anything, feel free to speak up." She gave his hand a squeeze and went back to her seat at her desk.  


"Thank you, ma'am." He said, shaking his head and walking to his own seat. That had been strange, since most of the teachers seemed aloof towards their students. He guessed the war was changing a lot more than he thought.


	32. Chapter 32

Annie POV  


Several days past and they all fell into a new routine. School was no longer open on Fridays. They expected the teens to go work in the factories, though most avoided it if they could, for the factories were the first targets during the bombings. The military came up with a clever ruse then, taking old residential blocks and converting the insides into factories, while the outsides still looked like houses…just houses producing lots of smoke and with lots of people going in and out of them. In response, residential neighborhoods began to be targeted.  


Annie was out with Armin, Eren, and Mikasa. They had been sent out for the weekly food ration pick up. Rationing was hard, particularly for Eren, who had never known what it was like to have a limited amount of food. He was used to getting what he wanted when he wanted it. Annie was more irritated with having to hike halfway across town every week to go get food. Why couldn't they just give you enough to last a few weeks? That would be a smarter plan anyway. There was also talk of the government giving out stipends to people who opened up their homes for the misplaced citizens to have a place to stay instead of the public houses that were bursting at the seams. Foster Care for adults was 

Annie's take on the whole thing. Annie just had a feeling that her father was going to do it too, and had told him that if he did, she was moving in with the Jaegers permanently. He had just laughed at her.  


The four of them were halfway to the distribution center (what had formerly been a grocery store) when the air raid siren sounded. Annie watched Mikasa's head whip around, looking for a shelter that they could get into.  


"Over here!" A voice called. Annie looked over and saw an elderly woman standing on some steps, motioning to them. Without question, Annie seized a hold of Armin and pulled him down the steps. She could hear Mikasa and Eren descending the steps behind her, and the woman closing the outer door.  


They passed through a doorway at the bottom of the stairs into a dimly lit basement like room. Concrete walls, a single lightbulb on the ceiling…exactly like a typical basement. It reminded Annie of her own basement, though the ceiling seemed much farther away in this basement than her own. The woman had tried to spruce it up by adding a couple of couches and a rug.  


Annie sat down on one of the couches and watched the woman close the inner door. Eren, Mikasa, and Armin all piled onto the same couch Annie was already on. In the ensuing shuffle, Annie somehow ended up with her butt in Armin's lap and her legs flung over the arm of the couch. Mikasa had sandwiched herself right in the middle, and Eren was looking rather squished down on the other end.  


"Well, it's a good thing you're all rather small.” chuckled the lady, walking over and switching on a radio that Annie had not noticed. She then walked over to the couch opposite the teens and sat down daintily. "My name is Mrs. Patts."  


"I'm Armin, and this is Annie." Armin said, patting Annie's leg as he said her name. "And on this side is Mikasa and down on the end is Eren."  


"Lovely to meet you all." Mrs. Patts grinned as she nodded her head at them. Just then, the whole basement shook with what could only have been a bomb, and Annie felt Armin's arm wrap around her waist and squeeze her. She set her hand over his and squeezed back.  


"Was this your basement?" Mikasa burst out.  


"Oh yes. A long time ago. But after several wars, I decided it would be better used as a place of shelter, and the government told me it was deep enough. Back behind you is the steps to the house. And over through that other door is the emergency pantry, in case we get stuck down here."  


"Do you live alone?" Armin asked.  


"I didn't used to. I had a husband, and two beautiful sons."  


"What happened to them?" Armin's voice had gone soft as he stared at the woman. Annie took the moment of quiet to look at the woman, REALLY look at her. She had white hair, and a tanned, wrinkled face. She seemed like the type of lady who had been through a lot.  


"This country has been at war since long before most of your grandparents were even alive." She began, letting out a sigh. "My husband was home on leave, the late Mr. Patts. He was out playing with our older boy, Carlisle. He was ten. They barely had any warning. Bam. Most of my family gone in a second." She grew quiet.  


"I'm sorry." Armin said.  


"Oh, this was a very long time ago, but thank you."  


"You said you had two sons. What happened to the other one?" Eren asked.  


Annie twisted so that she could stare at him. Did the boy have ANY manners or sense of basic human decency? Apparently, Mikasa was having the same sort of thoughts as she elbowed him in the ribs and hissed, "Manners."  


"What? I was just asking a question."  


"A very insensitive one."  


"No, no. It's quite alright. My younger son, Elias was playing in the basement at the time. This very basement, actually. He was four at the time. He never even knew what had happened to his father and brother until hours later when they finally let me back into the house. He had dutifully stayed in the basement, like Mr. Patts and I had told him. We drilled it into our children when the siren went off, get in the basement until either Mommy or Daddy came and got them. Elias moved away when he was 18. Joined the army. He never came back home. He used to write me letters, but eventually, they stopped coming. I didn't want to move away from here though, in case my Elias ever did come home. I don't even know if he's still alive. If he is, he'd have to be old enough to be your grandfather, at least."  


"How long have you lived in this house, Mrs. Patts?" Mikasa asked.  


"Oh, well this was the house Mr. Patts and I bought right after we got married…oh, it's had to have been 67 years ago now…or maybe 68."  


The teens all looked at each other as the room fell silent. This woman did not look like she was near, if not past, 90. Of course, Annie had never met someone this old before. People in this country didn't live to be old. Not since they'd basically been at war for 70 years. She'd thought Armin's grandfather had been an anomaly. Even then, the war had come for him in the end, as it came for them all. But this woman was clearly in defiance of that rule. She had lost everything, and yet she still kept going, kept helping people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good luck with these final few chapters


	33. Chapter 33

Annie POV  


They were all still sitting down in Mrs. Patts basement, soaking in the story she had told, when Annie felt Armin tense up. Her senses all went on high alert and her ears became acutely aware of the chattering on the radio that they'd all forgotten Mrs. Patts had turned on. It was listing the areas that had been hit hard so far in this bombing.  


"Did that just say Polyver Square?" Eren asked.  


"I believe so."  


Eren was on his feet faster than Annie would have believed possible. "What's wrong?" She asked, shooting to her feet as well.  


"My mom's in Polyver Square! We have to go!"  


"We can't go!" Mikasa said, rising to her feet, as did Armin next to her. Annie could sense that something was about to happen, and guessed Armin could as well. "In case you've forgotten, there are bombs falling all over the place out there.” Annie saw Mikasa slowly shift so that she was in front of the door.  


"I don't care! That's my MOM!"  


"Eren! If a bomb is fated to hit her, it's going to hit her! Running out there and risking yourself will not help. Besides, I'm sure she's gotten herself into a shelter." Annie realized how much she sounded like her dad at that moment.  


"Shut up!" he yelled. In a sudden burst of energy, he bolted to the door that Mrs. Patts had said led up into the house.  


"Eren!" Mikasa yelled as the boy vanished up a flight of stairs. Annie watched Armin take-off up the stairs after him. She hadn't made a conscious decision to run herself, but before she knew it, it was like her body was moving on its own, through the doorway, and up the stairs after the boys.  


"Get back here, you idiots!" Mikasa yelled behind her.  


Annie dashed up the stairs two at a time, and passed through an open doorway. The house rushed by her in a blur. If you asked her what it had looked like, she honestly would not be able to tell you. It was just out the door, across a room (jumping and sliding over a table in the process), through a doorway, into a hallway. Looked to the right to see an open door with natural light pouring through. Must be the front door. Bolt through it out into the street. Look down the porch steps to see Armin grabbing a hold of Eren's arm. Good, he's caught him. See Eren shove Armin off and take off running down the street. Watch Armin take off after him. Blood pounding in the ears. As if from a distance, hear Armin call out, "Eren, you dick! Get back here before you get us all killed!" A chant in her head, beating in time with her heart. Must catch Armin, must catch Armin. Danger. Danger. Danger.  


Leap down the front steps and take off running after Armin. Faster than Armin. Must catch Armin. Danger. Danger. Stumble sideways as a bomb explodes somewhere nearby. Keep footing. Keep running. Must catch Armin. Danger. Danger. Must catch Armin. Blood roaring in ears. Can't hear planes, can't hear bombs. Must catch Armin. Must catch Armin. Must save Armin. Suddenly hear a plane. Look up. A plane over head, dropping bombs. Bombs falling. Bombs screaming through the air. Falling on her. Falling on Armin.  


"ARMIN!" She screamed at the top of her lungs, before being blown backwards through the air.


	34. Chapter 34

Annie POV  


The blood still pounded in her ears as she opened her eyes. ''Where am I? On my side. Why am I on my side? Bomb exploded. Bomb exploded on us. On me. On-' “Armin!” She screamed, sitting up abruptly and letting out a series of coughs.  


She felt utterly disoriented. What had happened to this place? Ears ringing. Can’t hear anything but the ringing. Ringing and pounding. Pounding. Pounding blood. Pounding feet. Running. Running after Armin. Armin!  


The teenager scrambled to her feet, stumbling slightly. Debris everywhere. Concrete. Paper. A shoe. Who’s shoe? Armin’s shoe? She stumbled over and looked at it. No. Not Armin’s shoe. A woman’s shoe. HER shoe. She looked down at her feet and saw that her shoe had been knocked off. Hehehe. Literally knocked her off her feet. She found herself giggling hysterically as she pulled her shoe back on. Armin would get a kick out of it. Armin! Right. Must find Armin.  


“Armin? Where are you?” She called out. She could hear herself now. But it sounded like her head was underwater. Her head whipped from side to side. Where was he? She had to find him. Had to find him. Looking around, she saw something lying in the street. Something blonde. “No.” she whispered, stumbling over. “No!” Tears welled up in her eyes as she fell to her knees beside him. He looked bad. He looked like death. “No, no, no…”  


“Annie?” He asked, opening his eyes.  


Annie gasped, feeling like she hadn’t had a breath in hours. “Oh, you’re alive. Oh thank goodness.” Her whole world focused on him, blocking everything else out. He’d been hit with shrapnel, while she had been far enough back to only get the shockwave.  


“Annie, your head is bleeding.” Armin reached up a weak hand and tried to sit up.  


“So is yours, now lay down.” She said, gently pushing him back down.  


“The proper word is lie. Lie down.” He muttered, not having the strength to fight her. The cuts on his face were the least of his problems. She ripped off her sweatshirt and pressed it to the wound on Armin’s stomach that just seemed to keep pouring blood. “Annie-“  


“My head is nothing right now.” She wanted to keep herself calm, but blind panic had taken over, and she was shaking.  


“Is it that bad, then?” He asked, as if talking about a bad test grade.  


Annie looked at his face as more tears sprung into her eyes. “What?”  


“Is it bad? My-you know?” He motioned down at his abdomen.  


“I-“  


“Annie. I know how bad it is.” He said, catching hold of one of her shaking hands.  


“We have to keep pressure on it. We have to-“  


“I can’t feel my legs, Annie.”  


“You’re just in shock. It’ll come back.”  


“I don’t think so.”  


“Then we’ll get you a wheelchair!” She snapped, her eyes locking with his.  


“I think we both know I won’t make it that long.”  


“No! Don’t say that! You’ll be fine. We just need to keep pressure on it.”  


“No, what I need is surgery to repair the internal organs that have probably been perforated by shrapnel. And I’m not seeing a surgeon around here.”  


“No! No. You’ll be fine. We just have to believe that you’ll be fine.”  


“Annie-“  


“You stupid idiot! Why’d you have to run out after him?”  


“Why’d you have to run out after me?” he retorted. Annie could see how pale his face already was.  


She just shook her head. “Please don’t leave me.” She whimpered.  


“I’m not exactly thrilled about this development.” His hands felt like ice as he began to shake. Annie abandoned his wound, seeing the futility of the situation, and moved instead to cradle his head and shoulders.  


“Hush now. I’m here.”  


“Do you think I’ll get to see my mom again?” His voice was growing fainter.  


“Of course you will. She’ll be the first in line waiting for you, along with your grandfather, and your father, and Petra.” She took a deep breath and managed to stop crying. 

“And you know who else will be there? My mom. And I know she’ll just love you.”  


“You think so?”  


“I do. Who couldn’t love you?” She said, one hand stroking his hair. Some part of her had come to accept what was actually going to happen to Armin, while another part completely rebelled against it. Refused to acknowledge its existence. The wind blew his hair across his face, blowing with it the foul stench of fire and death and everything else that went with it. “Your stupid hair.” She sniffled. “It will never stay out of your face.”  


“You know, my mom used to sing me this song when I was little. I forgot about it for a long time after she was gone but…when I was eleven, I came across it, and realized that it was about dying. Pretty depressing topic for a lullaby…but I just…I remember this one line, ‘Safe in my arms…you’re only sleeping.’ That sounds…really nice, doesn’t it?”  


Annie nodded her head, tears springing into her eyes again. He looked so pale. His face felt so cold. She knew what was happening of course. With the severe anemia he was now suffering, all blood flow to his extremities was being cut off to divert the remaining blood to the vital organs. Unfortunately, the vital organs were what was bleeding out, thereby furthering the process exponentially. “My mom used to sing it to me too.” She said softly. “I always liked the idea of passing over the sea to white shores. It seems like such a nice place to go after living in this hell.” Armin stayed quiet. He seemed to grow colder by the second. Like he was already dead. This was such a horribly slow way to go. “I love you.” She said in a sudden burst of emotion. She was losing him, whether she accepted it or not. He needed to know that he was loved in this world, and to be able to pass with that feeling within him. To be able to leave from a peaceful place. “No, that’s not enough. I am totally and completely in love with you. I have been basically since I met you, and I know I should have said it before, but I was just so afraid, but I’m not anymore. Armin, I-“  


“I know.” He said weakly, managing to pull her head down so that they were kissing.  


She pulled away and whispered, “That’s my line.”  


He cracked a small smile before it slipped. “I never thought I’d go this way. I mean, bleeding out was…always a possibility, but I thought…it would be quick, you know…with a razor, or…I’d jump in front of a train or something…I never thought it would be this…slow…That I would have time to think about it…” She could tell the exact minute his bravado crumbled as tears began to fall down his face. “I’m scared, Annie…so scared.”  


“Oh baby, I’m here. I’m right here.” She gathered him up closer, pulling him up closer to a sitting position, and cradling his back to her chest, her cheek resting against his hair. “I’ve got you. I’ll always have you. You’re safe right here. Safe in my arms. Close your eyes and go to sleep, baby. Go to sleep and everything will be better. The white shores are calling.” She could feel that his breath was failing him as his lungs began to give out, and he was sucking in air more rapidly in a panic. She wanted him to be at peace, so she did the only thing she could think of. She began to sing.  


“Lay down your sweet and weary head. Night is falling, you have come to journey’s end. Sleep now, and dream of the ones who came before. They are calling from across a distant shore. Why do you weep? What are these tears upon your face? Soon you will see, all of your fears will pass away. Safe in my arms, you’re only sleeping…”  


She felt the moment Armin’s life slipped away from him. Her singing died out as she began to wail, tears streaming down her face. Sound truly seemed to come back to her then as she cradled Armin’s body. Bombs screamed through the sky, airplanes whined, explosions roared. She felt it was a fitting background, as her whole life seemed in utter chaos, everything she loved was dying. Her heart was dying, her soul breaking.  


Her whole body began to heave as she sobbed, sitting in the middle of Tenth Street during the biggest and worst air raid of the war.


	35. Chapter 35

Mikasa POV

Mikasa had been slow getting out of the house. She had not been her usually graceful self in her worry over Eren and Armin, and had slammed into a table coming up the stairs from the basement. Limping slightly, she had managed to get out of the front door. Standing on the front porch, she couldn't figure out where they had all run off too. Panic flooded thought her, coursing through her veins thicker than blood. Her brothers were out here, and they were in danger and she couldn't find them.  
She took several deep breaths and tried to think. Polyver Square was north of here, so she had to go left. Taking off down the road, she tried to keep her breathing steady. If she gave into the blind panic that had settled just out of view, she would never find the boys…or Annie. As much as the blonde irritated her, she could see that Annie was good for Armin, and did not want anything bad to happen to her.  


Mikasa couldn't believe how fast Eren and Armin were running. She'd always been faster than the two of them…probably combined. She guessed that they had both given in to the blind panic though, Eren to get to his mom, and Armin to get to Eren.  


The teenager heard the shriek long before she ever looked up. She was flung to the side as the bomb exploded, barely cushioning her head as she was slammed into a wall. "Ow." She moaned, sitting on the ground, ears ringing. She blinked several times, dust drifting into her eyes. They began to water from the smoke and dust and she quickly wiped them, clambering to her feet. It was already hard enough to see, she did not need tears obscuring her vision. Blinking again, she looked around her. There was smoke rising in a great plume from the next street over where the bomb had hit.  


She gave her head a quick shake. The others wouldn't have been on that street. They may not have even felt the explosion. So she had to keep moving. She took a step to try and run, and felt a stabbing pain shoot up from her ankle. "Ah!" She cried out, falling to her knee as her leg gave out from under her. Running was out of the question, but she had to keep moving. Climbing back to her feet, the teenager began to limp down the street as fast as she could, sticking close to the buildings so as to avoid making a target of herself to some bored pilot who was not content to the possibility of destroying life.  


The world felt like it had fallen into hell. Maybe this WAS hell. Mikasa didn't know. All across the city, she could hear the shrieks of the bombs falling and the booming of the explosions. The tearing apart of buildings as stone was blasted to pieces and metal rent in half. On occasion, she could even hear the shrieking of some unfortunate person, though they were soon drowned out. She barely even recognized the street she was on anymore, even though she'd been down it dozens of times. The only thing keeping her from falling into the chaos as well and letting the panic back is was the thought of finding the boys. She had to find them. Find the boys. Find the boys. Find the boys. It beat like a drum in time to her limping. Find the boys, find the boys. She even began to mutter it. "Find the boys. Find the boys." Find the-She heard the shriek of the bomb falling, and had the sense to duck against a building. She covered her ears as it ripped down the whole street. Mikasa curled into a ball to shield herself from debris. The whole world seemed to shake and her ears were really ringing. This was madness. Complete and utter madness. Why was she out here? This was suicide. Surely, she'd be killed if she didn't go inside and take cover. She should just go back to Mrs. Patts house and wait it out. Her ears were shrieking. She couldn't even hear herself breathing. Mikasa clamped her hands over her ears. Make it stop. Make it stop. She was sure she was going to go crazy if the noise in her ears didn't stop.  


It felt like eternity before she could finally hear outside noise again. She clumsily climbed to her feet and looked around. Smoke drifted heavily through the air. Letting out a cough, she peered through it and saw a road sign that was somehow still standing. Washington Street. She was stunned. She'd run/limped almost 15 blocks. It hadn't seemed like it.  


The teen snapped back to reality as another bomb hit the ground a few streets over. It was dangerous out here and she had to find the boys. She set off down the street, still limping. Adrenaline was clearly the only thing keeping her going at this point. She had made it about 50 feet when she heard the wailing.  


"No, no, no! Please! Please come back to me!" Mikasa felt a jolt of fear go through her. The voice almost sounded like Annie. She began to move fast, eyes squinting as she tried to see through the smoke. The words of the person had died out, and became one continuous sound of distress and sorrow.  


A breeze blew down the street and Mikasa stopped moving as the smoke drifted away. "No." She said quietly, "No, no, no." One of her worst nightmares was in front of her. Annie was kneeling on the ground, cradling a blonde body that could only be Armin. Her own body began to move of its own accord, because she felt frozen inside. "Armin." She whispered, falling to her knees opposite Annie. Annie didn't even seem to register that someone else was there until Mikasa reached out to touch him.  


"Don't touch him!" The blonde shrieked, shoving Mikasa's hand away.  


Mikasa did not feel like she was in control of her body. It felt like someone else had taken over as her hand rose up and slapped Annie across the face with a resounding crack. "You don't get to tell me what to do. He was my friend first."  


"Yeah, well where were you when he wanted to die?" Annie hissed out.  


"Where were you?" Mikasa snapped back with just as much malice. Though venom coursed through her veins, she very gently reached out and closed Armin's eyes. She took a deep breath, though her breath seemed to catch part way as tears pricked at her eyes. Armin, though only a few months younger, was like her baby brother. He couldn't be gone. Sweet, kind caring Armin couldn't be gone. Smart, sarcastic, charismatic Armin could not be dead. It didn't feel possible.  


It was the screeching of a bomb a couple of streets over that brought Mikasa back to her senses. "Annie, we have to get off the street."  


"No! I won't leave him."  


"Annie-" Mikasa was losing her patience and her usually very well controlled temper. Part of her felt like she should just leave the girl behind. But Armin would not want that, so Mikasa rose to her feet and seized a hold of Annie's arm and pulled. "Let's go!"  


"Get off of me!" Annie shrieked, trying to pull away, and batting at Mikasa's arm.  


Mikasa drew back her arm and slapped Annie again, even harder this time. "Listen, stupid. Do you think Armin would want this? You sitting in the street and being blown up? You think he'd want you to join him? Now let's go!" Mikasa gave a great heave, and pulled Annie like three feet before the blonde began to struggle, clinging to Armin like a ship wreck victim clings to a piece of driftwood.  


"No!" She shrieked. "No, we can't just leave him lying in the street like a piece of trash!"  


"We also can't haul him into a bomb shelter! Annie, I know you love him, but carrying him along with us will kill us too."  


"I don't mean carry him all the way to a bomb shelter! I just don't want to leave him in the street to get run over by a truck."  


Mikasa let out a sigh. She was obviously not going to win this battle, and to be completely honest, wasn't sure if she wanted to. "Grab his feet."  


Annie looked up at her, clearly confused. "What?"  


"Grab. His. Feet. We're going to carry him to that alley over there."  


"You want to leave him in an alley?"  


"Oh for fuck's sake! What would you like to do? Carry him all the way to his house? Perhaps even bury him yourself next to his family? We're in the middle of a bombing! That alley is probably the safest for him, because he won't get run over by a truck, or picked up to go to the identification centers, heaped with all of the other dead bodies. We will come find him after it's done bombing."  


Tears began to fall down Annie's face as they remained quiet for a moment. "Do you think Eren's okay?" She slumped, defeated.  


"That stubborn idiot is fine."  


Annie looked up at Mikasa as she climbed to her feet, a sudden fury in her eyes. "He won't be when I find him. His stupidity killed Armin." Her voice cracked as she gently bent and grabbed Armin's legs, leaving Mikasa to scramble to get his upper body.  


Mikasa swallowed hard, tears burning at her own eyes as they struggled their way over to the alley. As much as it broke her heart to admit, Annie was right. Eren's stupidity HAD caused Armin's death…and it would destroy him when he found out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading and your kudos and your comments. They mean the world to me. And if you liked this, follow Annie in the next installment of the series, No Fair Fight.


End file.
